Everybody wants a piece of my world.

How can there be too many fatmouths around?! Gimme a break for crying out loud! I'm back being a recluse (which I have always been) ...yet just like Brit, rumors about me still spread around like a contagious disease.

Here's the story...

My idle-phone-no-more received a msg yesterday afternoon (from this guy who have been trying 'desperately' to get me to return his msgs for days) that I was pregnant when 'we' left our former place in xxxxxxxx. Like, huh?! *glaring eyes*

(I read the msg just a couple of hours ago so I reacted a bit delayed. hihi)

My folks left that place years ago. And FYI, I left the house a couple of years before that. So, whatda?!!! I'd appreciate it more if they'd tattle about me being a witch or something ...any moniker similar to how I had been a hermit my entire years in that place will actually do. But come on now!!! I didn't even have friends there except my early morn basketball chums (and they're all boys)... But, lost touch until I left. So, who could be this smart-alecky babbler pretending to know my life story now? Who knows who I really am, itfp?! NO ONE.

...and if because of this post, another rumor will be passed around -- "I left the house because dad found out I was pregnant and disowned me as his daughter" -- get a gun and shoot me now. I dunno how else to live a quiet life without people trying to put words into my every action. It's just so sick. Ridiculously sick!

Any other 'original' and 'unique' scuttlebutts to announce? Cause this one is, frankly, so 'ancient' already!

it's all just the same at the end of the day

Maybe I should just live in a garbage truck. Will be Much better. Just make sure you have my contact numbers in case you want to pay a visit.

Beneath the stains of time the feelings disappear.

It's ironic how you run after someone and they run as fast far away from you. And the persons who are running after you, you keep running away from.

Just when can we ever learn to desire what we truly deserve than insist on something we clearly can't have? -- so, I guess I shall say goodbye to Bugatti Veyron.

It's hard to say goodbye.

...on the 2nd thought...

I suddenly started rethinking this line... "you can't lose what you NEVER had".

...but how can two souls still eat together when life has lost its taste?

A sure way to shake off excess pounds and stay lean: have only veggie juice and slices of fruits for breakfast. You may add a small serving of oats if you wish.

Get back to me for feedbacks -- positive or negative. If feedback is unfavorable I will stress that the idea didn't come from me. Just read it from a health glossy. If it's rather affirming, I accept thank-you notes. *wink*

........................................................................

Bad luck and good luck happened to me last Sunday. First, I never knew how strong a Panda bear was until I got kicked by one. Ouch!

Happy chance: a cute gentleman found me so amusing and handed me posies. Geesh. *shy*

Must be just sugar rush... or could be head trip. heh Nah! Just needing a few z's. Toodle-oo for now!

All these thoughts are never resting and you're not something I deserve.

Yes, I remember I mentioned in my previous post I will be sharing about work out tips on my NEXT post. And this is supposed to be the 'next'. Let's skip that topic, at least, for today, though. Am not really into blogging mood but feeling the urge to still post something. Just anything. Maybe to beg for a new gizmo? Any generous soul to donate a sleek one? *grins*

I am not making any sense here (as of yet), I already know. haha.

Should I rather just make a brilliant suggestion -- there must be "NO frowning areas" in most establishments? You might be protesting, where the #&$@ did she get this (ridiculous) idea again?! But, believe me, you'll appreciate the suggestion big time.

Doing transactions is not something that I commonly do. Am new to this kind of thing and even buying a quick bite is something I'd let another do for me. But, everyday is not a lucky day, so they say. There will always be times that I'd have to do things on my own no matter how I detest it. Yesterday was one of those unlucky days. (yesterday was just a couple of hours ago as I write this, actually.)

Yeah, about 6 hours ago, I was in front of a scowling front liner. I know ...I know it's rather crazy to be smiling all the time without any reason, but I still think that customer service people should 'always' look pleasant and friendly, which is something this front liner am talking about failed to do the entire 3 hours she was attending to me. Very unenthusiastic in doing her tasks. Is this a sign of mere indolence?

For goodness sakes! Spare us (customers) of unaccommodating attendants. There should be qualifications and series of tests for customer service agents... Just to ensure a friendly environment. Why, I felt so unwelcome standing there for hours. She looked rather so exhausted and uninterested. Goodness! She's already fortunate that she's just sitting there in front of the computer inside an air-conditioned room. How many people are jobless or putting up with blue-collared jobs?! Not that am looking down on workers doing the dirty work. In fact, am applauding them that they seem to appreciate their jobs in stead of staying without one. They're much better than most of us who already have the easier jobs just attending to customers' needs and still would whine a lot.

...to makes things worse, many front liners don't even look pleasant at all. Am so mean to even include this but come on now! I need to be really vocal here. They don't already possess a better looking face and yet they are even too willing to scowl like they're carrying the world on their shoulders. Who doesn't have a problem for crying out loud?!

What's my point? If I were them, I rather just quit my job if I don't find the job challenging or if I see it routinary and a no-brainer than show every customer how I dislike being there in front of them. Every company management should do something about this concern. Such a perfect way to make a day one of the worsts.

Well, it will serve as a reminder for me to always wear a smile no matter what and be conscious not to look like that attendant. She just doesn't realise am only one of the many who laughed to self just staring at her do her thing with that face.

So, everyone, we should all be conscious all the time how we look. In everything we do, we should always have a mirror handy. Place it where you can check yourself from time to time. Whenever you're starting to scowl, bring that smile back and you'll feel much better and more energised to get through the day.

Makes any sense, now?

I'm torn between this life I lead and where I stand

Thoughts: How about coffee and crackers diet? Nah. Won't even work. I mean, who can really keep up with it? Just d#$n hard. Am pretty sure I can only do it for about a few days or make it a week...but longer than that? Impossible. Unless, I chain myself inside my room and have the door all locked from the outside. (A dialogue with self.)

Why is't food is all I see everywhere? This is so frustrating. Haha. (Drama princess.) Just, maybe I need to pray and ask for more discipline. Seems lost a bigger percent of it. Why, 2008 might be the year for big feed (at my body's expense!). Lame excuse.

Half of myself says, "yeah...eat more while you're young. Remember what Lolo Rich said? -- 'Enjoy festivities while you can. When you're old, you don't get to take pleasure in porking out anymore.' Makes sense."

The other half of myself questions, "how about your health?...your figure?". Also makes a lotta sense.

...then I'd pull myself to both directions from time to time but would usually end up getting dragged to the side where it's telling me to 'overindulge while supplies last'.

When you're old you can't eat everything everyone's enjoying anymore. Might put you at risk of lodging in a hospital room for weeks (or longer). When you're young, you can't eat everything that everyone's enjoying. Might cause you to become bigger ''horizontally'' and it will be harder to lose the pounds as you add age. Unless, you're one of those gifted with a rather dynamic metabolism. Errrrgg.

...but, Who cares? bwaha. When food is right there in front of you, all you do is gobble up and forget about the rest of the concerns. Just keep packing it away and regret a lil come Sunday. Well, you can sweat them out, anyway. Just up to you how you do it. Either deprive yourself of sumptuous food while everyone else is merrymaking; or you join them and just move around later. The latter choice sounds better to me. No more winking at banquets, then. Problem solved. *wink*

Sure you already have an inkling what are all the blabs about -- first taste to today's confessions on another chow down sequels. Such a vicious habit. Since before the past holidays, cravings never stopped. Til now when am suppose to start reducing my food intake and start trimming down the extra pounds gained. But for goodness sakes! I can't just sneer at those delish grubs. I just can't. Can you? *grins*

Icebergs stop over (Jan 6th)...*drum rolls*

Good thing am not into ice creams. Imagine how many calories I must shed had it been the case -- around 270 calories to burn after eating cookies and cream. Dunno but I don't really enjoy ice creams a lot. I would crave but I can't finish a cup. Good for me. I don't also like chocolates except the dark one with mint. *slobbering* Mom gave me some a few days ago. They're all done! bwahah

The Hungarian sausage was good. But, nothing beats Nenita's, though. Personal opinion of course. Whoever tastes Nenita, btw? The Crispy Boneless Bangus in Adobo sauce with Mango is also yumyum. At first, I was like..."what? Adobo sauce with Mango?" But, it's a must try.


Slammer Burgers Take Out (Jan 7th)

Yeah, crave for more.




Inside the box. Brilliant idea.




The burger tastes like 99% beef




Am estimating an average person can eat
3 SBs w/o fries




8 boxes of tiny burgers.
Not really tiny TINY.

It's just 200 something to buy 8 SBs. They also have fries but am trying to avoid it so, no fries for me. Like the idea that burgers are inside small boxes in stead of the reg plastic or foil wrappers. Easier to handle. Prices depend on what you want to include in your SB. This one is just cheeseburger.


Jan 8th at LukYuen

Mere luck, the food wasn't something that I enjoyed so...open and shut case, am not coming back there anymore. Just what happened to LY? Used to be one of my faves. But, I still luv their watermelon shake.


Dine in at Racks (Jan 9th)

Baby Back Slabs




Fish n Chips




Love their BBQ sauces.
You can actually buy them.

So, I need an answer now. Can you just walk away after having a look at the mouthwatering food displays? Toughie. My suggestion, whenever you have to leave the house, it's best to stuff yourself to the point that you can't eat even a light snack. Saves you from more calories to fry.

To discourage you more here's a

Calorie Table for Cheeseburgers

Cheeseburgers (1)	Calories
Cheeseburger w/o mayo	320
Cheeseburger w/o mayo (large)	610
McDonald's Cheeseburger	330
McDonald's 1/4 pounder with cheese	530
Burger King Cheeseburger	360
Burger King Whopper with cheese	850
Burger King Double Whopper w/ cheese	1,150
Wendy's Jr Cheeseburger	310
Wendy's Jr Cheeseburger Deluxe	350

From: Anne Collins

As if! None even helped to keep me away from food. Not even the fitness magazines I recently bought. hehe

Expect to read work out tips in my next post. *wink*

You could be a model. It's too bad you're not sexy.

...is the feasting over?

Goodness, have gained pounds around my waist and thighs. Might take time again before I lose these bulges. *sobs* Just look at this ... Grrr

There's a very simple solution to protruding lower abdomen, actually. So, for girls out there who have developed excesses around the midsection after the holidays, you might be interested to read what advice I am to share.

Simple. Buy a skip rope. It promises a burn rate of 1300 cal/hour. It is an effective cardio work out and is said to be one of the best ways there is to burn fat. Like jumping at a moderate speed (70 to 120 turns/min) for at least 15 mins can burn around 150 to 200 calories. It's better to start with a lil heavy jump rope, though. Then, eventually, you can use the light one just for maintenance.

They say, if you want to burn fat faster, you can combine jump rope with push up and squat. Or, with run-in-place and squat. Squat is important for girls to get rid of the unwanted fat on the inner thigh. Since, it's impossible to target a specific area where fats are concentrated, cardio work out is the best option. Jump rope is my best bet.

Of course, at first, you can only do about a few jumps or a few seconds jumping. That's just fine. You can do skip rope, squat and run-in-place alternately until your muscles have adjusted or when your stamina has improved. Just do this regularly or at least 3 times a week. But, if you want faster result, then, get serious with it.

Oh, you can also do, skip rope and hoola hoop. That's more like playing, right? There are still more alternatives to burn fat like badminton, walking, running, basketball, aerobic exercises, dancing, etc. You can even opt to go to a gym nearby. Anything, but, of course...all require discipline. So, if you don't have it, then there's no hope for you.

There's another aid that might help -- Spanx. It's more of hiding the bulges when you have to wear tight clothing. Am not sure but if it works like the waist trimmer (a rubberized something that is wrapped around the breadbasket)..maybe it might help. Waist trimmer belt heats midsection and is said to increase blood flow. Best to use when jogging or doing any physical workout.

(Maybe, you might want to try Xenical or Xando. There's another one, Zhen de Zhou.)

However, none of what I have suggested will work without discipline. So, it helps if you control your food intake. Choose healthy snacks and meals. Drink plenty of water and keep moving. Healthy lifestyle is the key to a fit body. *wink*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I have always been offended by the song that says, 'Everything is beautiful in its own way.' If everything is beautiful, then the word 'beautiful' has no meaning. If everything were purple, there would be no word 'purple' in the language because it would not distinguish one thing from another."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

If you wake up at a different time in a different place, could you wake up as a different person?

Up to the last minute of 2007, everything had been all about FOOD.

After my previous post, there had been sequels of food trip. Each time, I'd said, "after this...I won't eat anymore." Easier uttered as always. Especially, when it's about eminently piquant dishes. Food was something like running after me. They're ubiquitous... unfortunately for me. Hah. Sound like I didn't enjoy. Well, how about those moments of non-stop masticating, huh? Guilt just come after...habitually. A bit too late.

Here's our KR spree...

Now, you see it...

...now you don't

tempting

hmm yum

...there were still more food frolic after but no snapshots to show. Heh. Meaning...no evidence for me. Just this extra fats around my waist, though. *sobs* More pants are getting harder to put on, which tells me, I badly need to move around and do crunches.

Well, am proud to say that the first thing I did this start of the new year was to workout. About 45 minutes with all the noises outside; I was starting my daily dozen. No, that's not my NY's resolution. Don't have any, actually. I rather call it 'agenda'. Hope to keep up with it the entire year. A call for more discipline.

For NY's Eve, these were what's on my dining table:

...but they all have to wait until later to be gobbled, so at this moment, they're all sitting inside the fridge.

I am not into traditions and beliefs. Like there has to be a variety of round fruits on the table to make the coming year a prosperous one. I just don't believe that. Just how many people have been doing this yearly? Truth is, prosperity all depends on us. So, nothing round on the table except the plates and bowls...and of course, the yummy pan pizza.

Didn't wear polka dots either. heh. I thought the idea was cute, but I was too scared to stay in my room longer (because of the loud booms) to find a polka dot top (or dress). In fact, I wasn't even dressed to the nines. For what? To sleep after? Nah!

No firecrackers even. Am trying to spare my nose of thick and dark boogers. But, I failed. Thick smoke successfully sneaked inside the house. So, I was like choking while doing the stationary walk.

2:50am of Jan 1: "Life or Something Like That" is what's on Studio 23 (next was Bedazzled a few minutes before I was almost finished writing the blog entry). Nothing good to watch and am not in the mood to do movie marathon. Not now that am the only one awake. I just want to break the silence so I let the TV on.

It's 2008. Although, nothing seems to be different (just there were incessant blasts earlier but now it's just my TV dominating the room), it really is a new year. *shakes myself* How swiftly 2007 went by, isn't it?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Glimpse on the previous year...

January: I was just so controversial the year before and have become more a hot potato. There were rumors left and right. Eventually, started becoming depressive.

Struggles and dilemmas came in battalion and it felt like they're never gonna leave me. In fact, they've become good friends of mine.

February: More pain. Endless crying. More unpleasant news. Almost lost hope. Yet, still tried showing a (forced) smile.

March: Another dilemma -- Should I stay or should I go? Everything was like leaving a crack on the walls of my already bruised heart. What was keeping me? What was there to hold on to?

April: Finally decided and said goodbye.

May: Struggling to move on and forget about the horrible experiences. Had a hard time believing all that happened to me in that rotten place. Twas tough, but it unleashed the resilience I have within.

June: A ray of sunlight. I have started to bounce back. I've learned to fight. But, like a neophyte, I had done things a bit overboard. Was driven by fear and need for self-defense. Later on, learned how to do things the right way.

Once again, acquainted with myself.

July: Good things started saying hello to me and I welcomed each one with both arms wide open. There were still stings left, but I have become stronger by the day.

August: Faith has started to grow back inside me. Started seeing things in a different perspective. Learned new things everyday. Learned more about myself and my strengths everyday.

September: Inch by inch got out of my box. Lesser gloomy days.

October: Learned that things might have changed and things might have improved but it doesn't mean there's not going to be any struggles anymore. Still, I have to get up every morning and go on.

November: Been a lot busier. Was sick every now and then. Almost always stressed, but nothing stopped me from appreciating how GOD granted my heart's desires one by one.

December: Realised how God loves me so much that He lifted me up just when I needed a hand. Just when I was so low and lost; feeling worthless. He has always been with me through all those circumstances. I understood HIM better the previous year. I learned and understood what HIS grace is all about.

While I was dwelling in sadness and disappointments, God was with me. He sent people who, by and by, touched my life. Taught me not to be too critical with myself. Took me a long while before I learned that whatever I do, people are always going to talk and there's just no way I can stop them. Figured out, it's their way of protecting themselves. They mess with another to cover their personal issues, their envy, their own disabilities. Their most effective weapon is their tongues.

The world is a battle ground. Whoever is the fittest survives. If you're weak, it is just not the place for you. The world is not the place for me. Not because I am weak. But, because I refuse to learn the ways of the wicked. I want to remain a child and not become a monster. To be in this world, how can you not act like a beast even for one brief moment?

But I cling to this... The Paradoxical Commandments by Dr. Kent M. Keith

People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.
Love them anyway.

If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
Do good anyway.

If you are successful, you will win false friends and true enemies.
Succeed anyway.

The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.
Do good anyway.

Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.
Be honest and frank anyway.

The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds.
Think big anyway.

People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs.
Fight for a few underdogs anyway.

What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
Build anyway.

People really need help but may attack you if you do help them.
Help people anyway.

Give the world the best you have and you'll get kicked in the teeth.
Give the world the best you have anyway.

2008...I will become what I ought to be. Will try to be without fear; in stead, only with faith, hope and love. I have a few things in my list of this year's agenda. I won't promise but I believe with all my heart that I can do them with God's grace.

Like me, I'm sure most of you have felt you have had more pains than comfort the previous year. So, we all thought. But, no. It's only we chose to dwell on the very things that make our life miserable. We gotta throw garbage away. We ought to become better persons each day. Whatever hampers us from becoming what we ought to be should be eliminated. That's the only way to move forward. Learn but never become bitter.

I love 2007 and I will love 2008 more because I am looking forward to what GOD has in store for me.

Happy New Year all.

Current mood: Sleepy but still energized.