A wonderful gift may not be wrapped as you expect.

...encourage each other every day, while you still have something called “today.”           

― Hebrews 3:13, ERV

The best gifts we can ever receive in this world are immaterial. Not sure if this is true for everyone but for me, it is. I am not the kind who expects to receive stuff whenever there are special occasions, though, I tend to express lavished appreciation for even the small presents handed to me. Y'know, like a lil child given a balloon ― all smiles and wide-eyed. ^_^ 

Material things get lost, can fade, wear out, break... but what remains forever are gifts that cannot be seen, cannot be touched, cannot be heard, cannot be tasted but can move the heart. They become a part of you. They help you see yourself better than yesterday. They add value to your substance. They're not seen by the naked eye but can be felt by the heart. 

If there is anything that I am most thankful for is that people give me the gift of TRUST. You know your own efforts, determination and perseverance. Fact is, it seems that it's only you who know about them. Most of the time, they even go unnoticed, neglected, ignored. You'd even resent that, in stead, you're treated as if non-existent or simply unappreciated by the way people act or react toward you. That often hurts and you'd feel like there's no point in continuing. But, it's really not the credit that you're after. When you function in love, act of service is but automatic. So, you go on. Then, just when you most needed it, the gift is given you. It's like a glass of cold water under the scorching heat of the sun. 

It's the same comfort anyone can receive through APPRECIATION. When no one seems to mind what hard work you've put into something, it gets exhausting. Like a fuel is to an engine, this gift is somewhat a necessity in any person's life. It's a lift when you're so down and feel like giving up. Guess everyone needs a tap on the back from time to time to know they're doing a good job as insecurity can really creep in whenever things aren't going your way. Appreciation is like a blanket on a chilly night. 

No matter how tough the things we face, for as long as we receive these two abstract gifts, we are revived. People are for people. We're created for each other not against each other. It is important that we practice appreciating and trusting for these things can heal a doubtful soul. Often, when everything seems to keep failing despite your best effort, you want to just accept defeat. But, when you know that there are people banking on you, it makes you strive more no matter how you're emotionally tortured. These are priceless gifts everyone longs for but cannot be begged. These are gifts better given voluntarily from the heart. Gifts incomparable to any gadget, accessories, etc. They speak more than the value of PSP, iPad, car, what-have-you. They enlarge the heart. 

LOVE is expressed through these gifts and that's what make them extra special. I thank everyone who filled my heart with joy through these gifts on the week of my birth anniversary. ^_^  I am so blessed.

“...if you have a message of encouragement for the people, please speak.” ― Acts, 13:15, NIV

  

Love without attachment is light.

Most people, as far as I can see, when they're in love with someone and the love isn't returned feel that they have a grievance. They grow angry and bitter. I wasn't like that. I never expected you to love me, I didn't see any reason that you should. I never thought myself very lovable. I was thankful to be allowed to love you and I was enraptured when now and then I thought you were pleased with me or when I noticed in your eyes a gleam of good-humored affection. I tried not to bore you with my love; I knew I couldn't afford to do that and I was always on the lookout for the first sign that you were impatient with my affection. What most husbands expect as a right I was prepared to receive as a favor.  ― The Painted Veil

Relationships seem harder these days because people aren't anymore willing to give unless they're so sure it's gonna be returned. Lately, I've even started asking myself if it's really true what the world says, "It takes two to make a relationship work." Logically, yes, it appears that it has to be a tandem effort. If it's just one it's most likely not to succeed. That's why it's called "relationship". You relate to a person (or persons). I can try and do everything I can to keep a relationship going but without the active participation of another, it's next to impossible to maintain. Either of the two persons need the partner's voluntary cooperation to keep it alive. Or it will eventually become tiresome for the person loving and working more.

I don't wanna delve so much into that view, though, if I am to consider the power of love. I think the very reason why most relationships don't last is because people believe it always has to be a tandem work. But, there'll always come a time when either one of the couple will fail and commit a mistake...grow tired and show less or no interest in keeping the relationship. Although, love may still be there, the other one also gives up after getting so tired from doing all the dirty job fixing the partner's mess. It's become an obligatory task of both to do something for each other and if that's not anymore happening, the relationship isn't anymore as good as it used to be. So, they end up parting ways.

Always the easy way out. Very rarely that people choose the unpopular move, which is to exert more effort and extend greater love. I dunno but I am saddened by the fact that we are only being fueled by what the loved person can give. If they fall short, our performance also gets affected. The basis of love isn't anymore from something divine and abstract. We already start to give reasons for it. "I love him/her because..." "I love him/her only if..."  "I love him/her but..."

By saying this, I am not trying to suggest that we should put up not being loved in return. That we should allow another person to treat us less than we ought to be treated. But, all am saying is, if we are to love, we need to stop focusing on expectations of return. There's a need to stop waiting and watching for obvious signs the love is increasing or deteriorating and in stead keep on doing and giving. I mean, just like the concept of running in a race and just looking ahead in stead of around to see if the rest of the others are running the same pace...or the concept where one is basing effort on the efforts of others (like in the workplace). I'd often hear people complaining ... "this and that person do lesser tasks and here I am drowning in the piles of work to do!" Even in love, our attitude is the same. We are unwilling to give more and resent tolerating another's lacks and weaknesses. Like the line I'd always use, we have been accustomed to doing investments rather than doing charity.   

 Relationships started going around "what's-in-it-for-me" mentality. "If I love you, you should love me back just the same way as I expected." No wonder a lotta quotes like this proliferates...

It's funny how we need to be reminded what the nature of love really is. I think the real problem is we've become so into convenience. Everything instant and easy. Technology makes life a lot simpler, so we thought. And everything being convenient, we refuse anything inconvenient. We don't wanna walk extra mile anymore. Why? What for...when I can simply get out that door? Nothing is as valuable to us as ourselves these days. We all think we're that special so we deserve more than what is being given us. Nothing is worth fighting for. Not even love.

But, as I meditate on how God is loving me, I realized there's no truth to what the world is injecting in the thoughts of human race ― "It takes two to make a relationship work." I won't deny it's a lot easier if both give the same amount of effort. But, I believe any relationship can still work for as long as there's still one person willing to give. Willing to love. "As long as one heart still holds on then hope is never really gone."

Pure love can change things. What cannot be moved by an act of kindness? Even the most jaded heart love can break. Only those who can't receive love because they know they're unworthy cannot be moved by it.

Some time ago, I didn't know how to receive love. God has been pouring His love graciously upon me but I just can't receive it because I know I was undeserving. Where did this thought come from? From the world which has been yelling at everyone saying: you aren't good enough. Someone's not good enough. You need to work work work before you can enjoy anything including love. And, that's why we also set that standard when loving others. But, God proved to me that it's all a lie that I need to deserve love before I can grab it. His love for me so moved me that it caused a change within. I am able to love with at least lesser expectations because He didn't expect from me. In fact, it's His choice to love me and I had no influence in that decision of His. I was not required to be loveable first. He just loved me and from it I learned to love Him back. His persistent love created between us a relationship that no one can ever break. He worked hard so that love can conceive in my heart. He didn't force me to love Him; in stead, He wooed me that I may start loving Him. 

For the longest time, I have been in a relationship with Him, it's all His work. I know about Him, I think about Him. I talk to Him. But, I wasn't really enough. Everything wasn't enough. I kept failing and I kept hurting Him with my actions and decisions. Most are deliberate. The love had been one-way for quite some time. What's amazing is, He never thought of leaving. He chose to stay and remain patient as I strayed. As I neglected Him. In stead of growing tired and giving up on me, He found genius ways to love me more so He can draw me back to Him. It's been all Him. So, why should I believe the lie of the world?

Yeah, yeah...He's God and we're not. Another lie people say. Another lie they allow to influence their beliefs. But, that's just all lie is about ― LIE. When you start experiencing the love of God, you get to have an overflow. He fills you with His abundant love and all the good stuff that it becomes more than enough to share with others. Well, too bad lies come one after the other. And worse, we may not fully enjoy LOVE in its truest form if we keep choosing to believe in lies. As for me...I've stopped believing them. I now only believe in LOVE.

Oh, before you leave...please take time to watch this vid...

“Love is always freely given. Love cannot be demanded. We can request things of each other, but we must never demand anything. Requests give direction to love, but demands stop the flow of love.”

― Gary Chapman

Toodle-oo!

 

Peace of mind comes from not wanting to change others.

“When you get to that point where you notice a person’s faults, 

you’ve got to decide if you can live with them or can’t live without them.”
― City Mouse 

I've learned that you can't control what other people are gonna think and feel about you. So, why need to be too careful? I rather just choose to be me ― do my thing...not care too much whether people like or not like it...enjoy ― than frustrate myself because people kept wishing I were something else than what they're getting. Am not a puppet or robot that will function based on anyone's expectations and liking. This is my design. If you can't put up with that, then please yourself and find what satisfies you. If am not doing you harm in a deliberate way, I think that's already enough. If you're hurting because of me... because of my design, then, am harmful to you, but it's still not my fault. So, quit the blaming. As different people have different reactions to certain medications...sometimes even food...maybe am simply your allergen. So, if am causing you more harm than good, then decide for yourself. Stop looking for more reasons to justify your lack of appreciation for the least of the things I do. Am not being mean. I just refuse to take more loads. That's all.

...and I believe this goes for everyone. Let's all live a stress free life. Get rid of toxins. Get rid of selfishness. Get rid of hate. Get rid of disappointments. Live and let live. Respect each other's differences. Just choose to be happy. ^_^ Happiness is my choice. I won't let anyone steal my joy. This is mine to keep.

“You don't ask nobody to give what they can't give, 

or be what they can't be. 

You've learned that, you got a head start on heartbreak.”

Choose: build something new and better from what is left or abandon it.

“Love chooses to believe the best about people. It gives them the benefit of the doubt.

It refuses to fill in the unknowns with negative assumptions. 

And when our worst hopes are proven to be true, love makes every effort to deal with them and move forward. 

As much as possible, love focuses on the positive.”
― The Love Dare  

 

Here typing my train-of-thoughts again...

 

You can try all you want to make someone see something that they don't want to see. Work with all your might to convince a person to realize what they need to realize. Just don't be surprised later on and end up frustrated when nothing's changed. You may have the best intention to help them improve their lives but the only thing you can really do is accept them exactly as they are today and love them for them. Love people for who they are and not for who you want them to be. If this is not all possible with you, let them go and let them find their own way, at their own pace, if they EVER choose to do so. Otherwise, you'll end up needlessly unhappy.

Once you notice yourself starting to get too focused on fixing a person ― every now and then looking for any trace of change or no change ― hold yourself back. You're not anymore loving. You're already trying to find reasons to love. But, since you find none (most of the time), you start collecting ill feelings. That's not healthy. When you begin the habit of nit-picking, you're only feeding yourself more reasons to justify your lack of love. It's, in fact, a sign there is no love or willingness to love. Might as well go some distance and take a break. If you think you can't find in your heart to accept a person, just choose to leave.

If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. ― Romans 12:18

 

Now, this is not me promoting self-interest here, but peace and harmony. If we end up expecting people to be how we want them to be and they refuse, we only set ourselves up to fail. And that means frustration. Frustrations translate to anger. Anger usually leads to bitterness. Before anything goes out of hand, might as well improve your state of mind or do damage control. That's all. 

 

I still believe that we ought to follow the two greatest commandments. Loving others as ourselves will really take a lot of pain before we master it. It's a discipline that requires lotsa flexing. We'll experience aches here and there. Because just like any discipline, we need to deny ourselves of certain things. If you don't want to fight, you need to shut your mouth and keep your hurt inside. You simply hafta mend your own broken heart. Things like that. But, if you're this kind of person who hoards, instead of letting go, it's not a good thing to solve the problem this way. Because it's just a matter of time and you'll explode. You're gonna be much worse than how you thought you are presently. We aren't supposed to be collectors of garbage but of collectible items. Sadly, many people seem to be so attracted to trash that they end up collecting them. 

 

Well, there's really no one rule for everything. It's not a one-size fits all thing. Just always choose the more beneficial one considering not only your own welfare but the welfare of others, too.       

Just saying...in case you find it impossible to really put up with loving the unlovable. Maybe, it's not yet your time. Maybe soon. But, until then, try saving yourself. Just make sure there's no negative feeling you're allowing to rent-free in your heart. Let go.

Good people who don’t stand strong against evil are like springs that have been polluted or pools that have turned dirty and muddy. ―Proverbs 25:26

Keeping it short...Ta-ta for now! ^_^

A world where rumors are a trend & truth is an afterthought.

"...in everything God works for the good of those who love HIM." Am so convinced this is true. This entire month and the month before, it's all been about things inexplicable. Many sad events happened. If I have no faith in God, I could've really been sucked alive by the tragedies I personally experienced and the tragedies of people close to me and other people I know. The mind always tries to find and give reasons to why things happen. But, there are times, answers aren't really needed. We only have to believe that whatever purpose there might be, it's all for the good no matter how it looks so bad. Live by faith NOT by sight.

...and to conclude this month, I'd like to share (not for the last time, don't celebrate!) about JUDGING others.  There have been numerous arguments about this topic ― personal views and opinion of people about this instruction from the Bible: DO NOT JUDGE (ref. Matthew 7:1-5, Luke 6:37). 

The command is obviously plain and simple if you come to think of it. It's a no-BUTs command. But, because people want to legitimize and excuse their acts, they'd refer to other scriptures/verses they can use. Like this one..."judge with right judgment." (John 7:24). Because they found a line that says it's ok to judge ONLY it should be "righteous judgment" they think they're given the ticket to do it. Am not claiming am a Bible expert or anything but I search for the Truth because I am inclined to throwing judgments, as well. It's sooo tempting especially when we're focusing on the lives of other people in stead of our own. I strongly believe that nobody has the right to judge. My basis...

God is the One who gave us the law, and He is the Judge. 
He is the only One Who can save and destroy. 
So it is not right for you to judge anyone. 
 ― James 4:12, ERV

True enough. Who could better judge righteously but the One Who gave the commandments? Besides, because of man's complexities and lack of knowledge and understanding, who can truly make right judgment? I mean, looking at an object then ask three people to describe it, you'll end up with different descriptions. We all have different perspective and views. And, it's basically why the commandment was given to us ― because our understanding and knowledge aren't the same as God's.  The Lord says, “My thoughts are not like yours. Your ways are not like Mine. (Isaiah 55:8). If that's the case, we could be wrong about what we think, see, or feel. People think that whatever they do is right, but the Lord judges the reasons for everything they do. (Proverbs 21:2) 

This explains why Jesus described the pharisees as hypocrites. They can easily hide their evil thoughts behind godly actions. Like I'd always say, it's easier to follow rules than be judged and be punished. People become too careful following a bunch of rules and they end up comparing themselves with other people whose sins are widely exposed. Indeed, like what the Word says,  

(Matthew 7:15) 

The Lord said, "These people claim to worship me, but their words are meaningless, and their hearts are somewhere else. Their religion is nothing but human rules and traditions, which they have simply memorized.        ― Isaiah 29:13 

Funny thing about religious people, they're the very ones who gossip a lot. They're the ones who make quick judgment. Once they see something with their eyes ... they rush to spread it like wildfire. Are we forgetting the Word also tells us, "Don’t be too quick to tell a judge about something you saw. You will be embarrassed if someone else proves you wrong." (Proverbs 25:8) 

We aren't with everyone round-the-clock. We don't have CCTVs that monitor what people are doing when they're not around us. God is the ONLY ONE Who is omnipresent so, only HE has the sole right to judge. Besides, God looks at the heart. He doesn't just focus on actions. That's why He called the pharisees  HYPOCRITES. They're doing all the good stuff, but inside them are bad stuff. They show off they know the Law but did not really do what the Law requires based on God's intention. And, because they're very careful in observing the Law, they were too quick to pass judgment on others to give themselves credit for the good work they'd done.

Many people, especially religious ones, these days are like those pharisees who are so good in doing ministries and acts of service to show they're better than others, which they use as tickets to pass judgment on others who sin differently than they do. Not considering that they, too, have so many issues to deal with. They end up weighing which sin is more evil. If theirs is lesser evil, that's already enough reason for them to condemn another. By this they're disregarding another Truth from the Word: "if we break anything stated in the Law, we break all."  (James 2:10) So, it doesn't matter whether your sin is just cheating and another's murder. Let's understand that that's mainly the purpose why Jesus had to walk on Earth and die on our behalf ― because NONE is capable of fulfilling ALL what the Law requires. All have sin and fall short of the glory of God! ALL. So, for crying out loud, can we ALL excuse fellow Christians we think are falling short and say the same things we're using as excuses whenever we fall short?!  Some overheard lines are: "I thank God for His mercies are new every morning..."I thank Jesus for saving me because I can't save myself." If someone we know sins, we can say the same things and trust that God is working in their lives, as well.

Sadly, though, many are hiding behind their closets. They're so good and pleasant when around other people but inside their homes, inside their rooms...in their hearts...what really is there? Who really are they? In fact, being too itchy to judge another already proves what tree they are for the Word says, "You will know the tree by its fruit." Did Jesus ever gossip or slander anyone? The Bible tells us, If we say we live in God, we must live the way Jesus lived. (1 John 2:6) Jesus, Himself, even said... I don’t judge anyone. But if I judge, My judging is true, because when I judge I am not alone. The Father who sent Me is with Me. (John 8:15-16)  That's Jesus, Himself, talking!!!

When Jesus bumped into this woman by the well (ref John 4), He knew what kind of life she's living. He even said her story accurately. But, HE did NOT judge the woman by telling her she's immoral or anything like that. And, definitely, HE did not go and told His disciples or others about her wrongs. In stead, HE ministered to that woman, showed real concern for her, which caused her to repent and change her ways. The Bible shows us Jesus' example. Why aren't we imitating Him? 

I believe that if one is living by the Spirit, s/he will do as Jesus Christ did, in stead of judging/condemning. We're all sinners. Christians are saints who sin because that's human nature. Everyone is in the flesh. So, when one falters, we need to help them up and not pull them down more by judging them. Brothers and sisters, someone in your group might do something wrong. You who are following the Spirit should go to the one who is sinning. Help make that person right again, and do it in a gentle way. But be careful, because you might be tempted to sin too. (Galatians 6:1) This was given as an exhortation because we all have the tendency to be tempted and fall. For NONE is righteous (Romans 3:10).  Left alone to ourselves, we will choose to do wrong, which is why we are encouraged to abide in Christ. 

It's so funny how we're always telling each other "HE Who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it..." yet, whenever a brother or a sister fails, we readily judge. We even tell everyone about how wrong they are and then stay away from that brother or sister. How about Apostle Paul's struggle? ― I don’t understand why I act the way I do. I don’t do the good I want to do, and I do the evil I hate.  What if a sinning brother or sister is also having that same struggle? Can't we simply let God work in the person's life, in stead? 

And are we not realizing that God's answer to Paul's plea to remove the "thorn in his flesh" was to help him be strong in the Lord and to keep him humble? The Apostle Paul said...But I must not be too proud of the wonderful things that were shown to me. So a painful problem was given to me—an angel from Satan, sent to make me suffer, so that I would not think that I am better than anyone else. I begged the Lord three times to take this problem away from me. But the Lord said, “My grace is all you need. Only when you are weak can everything be done completely by my power.” So I will gladly boast about my weaknesses. Then Christ’s power can stay in me.  (2 Corinthians 12:7-9)

Clearly, everyone...especially...Christians will undergo so many challenges in this world to test what they're really made of. God will always discipline us, mold us, prune us because HE wants us to be like His Son Jesus. God will strip us off our flesh and that can really be tough. Not at all times, we're gonna be strong enough to resist sin because when it gets hard, we are inclined to go back feeding the flesh. Some people struggle with temper, others lust, others drunkenness, some others much worse...some others really petty. Still, the bottom line is, we are being dealt with our own personal flaws and issues. If God is allowing each one of us our own pace to change, can't we be as gracious to allow each other's pace? 

You cannot judge the servants of someone else. 
Their own master decides if they are doing right or wrong. 
And the Lord’s servants will be right, 
because the Lord is able to make them right.
―Romans 14:4

Most of the time, there are really tangible and well-grounded evidences and facts that can't be ignored. It's true. But, they're still not enough grounds to conclude, assume and esp judge and condemn. Again, we only know very little to make judgments because we judge externally. God judges what's in our hearts. God doesn't only focus on the ACT, but the MOTIVES behind. 

Going back to John 7:24 - "judge with right judgment."... which in another version goes like this...stop judging by the way things look. Be fair and judge by what is really right ... we are being taught to not judge at all because like what Jesus gave as an illustration how the pharisees were following the Law of Moses ― about keeping the Sabbath holy and yet did circumcision on Sabbath then condemned Jesus that HE's healing on a Sabbath ― makes them manipulators of the Law. (Just like what Isaiah 29:13 says about them.) So, it appears this way ―  when they're the ones doing what the Law says they shouldn't do, it's acceptable. But, if it's someone else (in that case, Jesus) it's so WRONG.

Many are like this nowadays. They see the speck in another's eyes but can't see the log in their own eyes. They're unforgiving of the sins of their brothers while they're so forgiving of their own sins. In fact, if you're just really gonna be legalistic about the command: keep the Sabbath holy, both the pharisees and Jesus broke the Law, isn't it? It only teaches us that there are things, which in our petty judgment, are completely wrong that may not be wrong at all because it's not ONLY the act that God looks at but the motive. Also, we should remind ourselves of God's sovereignty. He ordained everything. And the following passages speak a lot about it:

God said to Moses, “I will show mercy to anyone I want to show mercy to. I will show pity to anyone I choose.” So God will choose anyone he decides to show mercy to, and his choice does not depend on what people want or try to do. In the Scriptures God says to Pharaoh: “I made you king so that you could do this for me. I wanted to show my power through you. I wanted my name to be announced throughout the world.” So God shows mercy to those he wants to show mercy to and makes stubborn those he wants to make stubborn.

 

So one of you will ask me, “If God controls what we do, why does he blame us for our sins?” Don’t ask that. You are only human and have no right to question God. A clay jar does not question the one who made it. It does not say, “Why did you make me like this?” The one who makes the jar can make anything he wants. He uses the same clay to make different things. He might make one thing for special purposes and another for daily use.  ― Romans 9:15-21

God has all the right to every person whatever He might purposed them to be. We are not to question another person's design. DO NOT JUDGE. We are all instructed to LOVE one another not to judge one another. God doesn't want us to change each other because that is HIS job not ours. We have made ourselves gods telling God how each one is malfunctioning in stead of saying, "God, I am malfunctioning. Please fix me."

Apostle Paul also said...

...I don’t consider your judgment on this point to be worth anything. Even an opinion from a court of law would mean nothing. I don’t even trust my own judgment. I don’t know of any wrong I have done, but that does not make me right. The Lord is the one who must decide if I have done well or not. So, don’t judge anyone now. The time for judging will be when the Lord comes. He will shine light on everything that is now hidden in darkness. He will make known the secret purposes of our hearts. Then the praise each person should get will come from God. ―1 Corinthians 4:3-5

Now, with all that I said, I must not ignore another passage that encourages Christians to judge problems between believers found in 1 Corinthians 6:1-3, When one of you has something against someone else in your group, why do you go to the judges in the law courts? The way they think and live is wrong. So why do you let them decide who is right? Why don’t you let God’s holy people decide who is right? Don’t you know that God’s people will judge the world? So if you will judge the world, then surely you can judge small arguments like this. You know that in the future we will judge angels. So surely we can judge life’s ordinary problems.

Let's not take the above passages out of context. Clearly, it talks about resolving conflicts between two people WITH the intention of restoring relationships. In the next passages, in fact, are exhortations to simply forgive and let go. Compare this to JUST judging with the wrong motives, with pride and arrogance, and without trying to restore the person doing wrong. Problem with many religious people, they judge, criticize and gossip with no intention of helping the person erring. See the difference? So many people look at another person as if they're so filthy and beyond cure forgetting that they, too, are still also sinning only in a different way. Thinking so highly of themselves. Just like the pharisees!!! 

So, if you aren't doing anything to help a sinning brother or sister and have no guts and intention to do so, better shut your mouth and stop doing wrong or else you, too, will be JUDGED!

~~~~~~~~~~~~

The steps of a person are ordained by the Lord—

so how can anyone understand his own way?  

―Proverbs 20:24

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~

 "Before you judge someone else, stop and think about all that God has forgiven you for."

 

  

Don't be critics and point out flaws in God's art.

Countless people are crushed inside themselves and live without hope these days. Many of them think that the world is nothing but an ugly place. That life is unfair. A lot see themselves as the world's rejects. But, I don't bite at this. It's not really the place that causes pain and misery. It's what's in it. Storm comes, yes. But, if only we function in love and compassion, storms could be easier to bear. In stead of pointing fingers and highlighting the wrongs of others...in stead of being indifferent and taking no accountability for the life of another... if only people walk in love... the world could've been a nicer place to live in.  

What's wrong is that many people... even close friends and many Christians... harbor so much hate, envy, jealousy, selfishness, and all other trash in their system and then talk about others behind their back. They stop coming around you, avoid you...do spiritual quarantine; or the least, fake smiles, conversations and niceness...in stead, of telling you what they think is wrong with you or whatever you might have done which offended them. Then, they go to Church every Sunday clapping, shouting, singing and acting their best to show they're good people.

It seems that people have found ways to kill or torture others, not physically, but with their words, animosity, hostility, indifference, judgment, criticisms, slander, hatred, bitterness, jealousy, envy...and all the many trash they hide inside themselves they use as spears. All those baggage should be let go rather than be used as weapons against each other. True enough... HURT PEOPLE HURT PEOPLE.

Be very careful not to use the Bible to your benefit...to manipulate people... and then ignore the parts in there that point to your wrongs. Like, "do not judge", "do not slander" ...especially, without really knowing the person or what really happened.

If anyone thinks himself to be piously observant of the external duties of his faith yet does not control his tongue but deludes his own heart, this person’s religious service is worthless. [James 1:26]

Remember this: There are some terrible times coming in the last days. People will love only themselves and money. They will be proud and boast about themselves. They will abuse others with insults. They will not obey their parents. They will be ungrateful and against all that is pleasing to God. They will have no love for others and will refuse to forgive anyone. They will talk about others to hurt them and will have no self-control. They will be cruel and hate what is good. People will turn against their friends. They will do foolish things without thinking and will be so proud of themselves. Instead of loving God, they will love pleasure. They will go on pretending to be devoted to God, but they will refuse to let that “devotion” change the way they live. Stay away from these people! [2 Timothy 3:1-5]

There is no other commandment highly emphasized by Jesus but these two:

‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind. This is the first and most important command. And the second command is like the first: Love your neighbor the same as you love yourself.’  [Matthew 22:37-40]

Whoever is of God loves because God is love. Love causes one not to do bad to others.

FAKE is the trend and so many are in STYLE!

To every person who gossiped about me; to everyone who tries to be close to me to know my story only to tell the world of it in a malicious manner; to the close-minded; to the judgmental and critic; to friends who turned out to be backstabbers; to those who envy and compete; and, to those who "secretly" keep their dislike or hatred toward me yet smile at and talk nicely to me: 

You all challenge me to become a better person. You all turn me into a stronger and wiser woman. For all that you have done -- no matter how bad and hurtful... you've unknowingly done so much in favor of me. For that, I THANK you ALL.

I share the same sentiment King David had...

If it were an enemy making fun of me, I could endure it; if it were an opponent boasting over me, I could hide myself from him. But it is you, my companion, my colleague and close friend.  We had intimate talks with each other and worshiped together in the Temple. [Psalm 55:12]

And this, my best friend, betrayed his best friends;
    his life betrayed his word.
All my life I’ve been charmed by his speech,
    never dreaming he’d turn on me.
His words, which were music to my ears,
    turned to daggers in my heart.  [v. 20-21]

 ~~~~~~~~~~

 You might call many people your “friends,”but it is hard to find someone who can really be TRUSTED. [Proverbs 20:6, ERV]

Evil people say things to make themselves look good,
but they keep their evil plans a secret.
What they say sounds good, but don’t trust them.
They are full of evil ideas. They hide their evil plans with nice words,
but in the end, everyone will see the evil they do.
Liars hate the people they hurt, and false praise can hurt people.
[Proverbs 26:24-28]

It's truly helpful to not EXPECT from anyone. You'll be so surprised to know ...the people you thought are sincere friends are the very ones who "secretly" hate you for whatever reasons you won't ever fathom. They are worse than enemies because they always try to inflict pain in ways unimaginable while you're unsuspiciously giving your trust. It's simply frustrating how no matter you give the best that you can...the best that you have...it'll never suffice. Some friends hide behind smiles but their hearts are filled with inexplicable animosity. You may arrive at different conclusions and try to fix what might be wrong with you, but the truth is, you will never be able to satisfy them because they're really not your friends right from the beginning, in the first place. Sad but true.

And, I learned this truth the hard way...

 

Not because I choose to do right I can expect others to do the same. I realized that I can only be responsible for my own behavior and attitude. I will never have any influence in another's. It's their choice. And, unless they resolve in their hearts to release animosity, hatred, bitterness, envy, and all other negative feelings they choose to nurture... I can never expect them to be considerate of my feelings. There's emptiness, hunger and thirst within them, which no matter how I try to fill will never be satisfied. I am not the solution. My solutions aren't gonna help either. I can try and try to be better as a friend, as a person...but, it is not I who can arrange what's messy in them. They need to drop the ill feelings -- hatred, jealousy, hostility, etc. -- first and experience God's love, mercy and grace. 

The world yells, "leave those who only cause you misery...and stick to the ones who give you more love and inspiration".  Tempting to consider, huh?! Very convenient. But, self-seeking. Opposite of what the Word says, "bear with the failings of the weak" (Romans 15:1) and "do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others." (Philippians 2:4)

Yes, I can't do anything about the way they feel about me...about the way they treat me. They may decide to stay fake all they want. But, I can't give up LOVING. It's so true...you'll only know that you love when you sacrifice. You sacrifice your own feelings for the good of another. I can't deny that loving those who hide their hatred behind fake friendship is PAINFUL. It truly is. And, there are times I simply feel like running away from them because I am so aware of the harm they intend to inflict. Just, how can I deny them love when God didn't deny His love from me even I don't deserve it? How can I choose to give up on people when God never thought of giving up on me? God knows my innermost thoughts. God knows I am inclined to choose things that hurt Him. Still, HE chooses to love me over and over and over...............

The command to "love your enemies" is indeed challenging. But, it's more tough to love a friend who betrays. Yet, the best contribution you can impart to anyone, esp the unlovable, is unconditional love. Because they need it most when they least deserve it. If I won't choose to love them in their worst state, who will? Yes, God will. But, how can they experience God if not through me? Christians are vessels of God's love, compassion, mercy, forgiveness...and all the good stuff. And as a Christian, I can't decide who should and should not receive any good stuff when they're in God's list of recipients. I have no right to skip anyone only because they're harmful.

So all of you should live together in peace.Try to understand each other. Love each other like brothers and sisters. Be kind and humble.  Don’t do wrong to anyone to pay them back for doing wrong to you. Or don’t insult anyone to pay them back for insulting you. But ask God to bless them. Do this because you yourselves were chosen to receive a blessing.

The Scriptures say,
“If you want to enjoy true life and have only good days,  then avoid saying anything hurtful, and never let a lie come out of your mouth.  [1 Peter 3:8-10 ERV]

I just place my confidence in one thing: "The Lord sees what happens everywhere. He watches everyone, good and evil." [Proverbs 15:3]  All I have to do is to "Turn to the Lord for help in everything you do, and you will be successful." [Proverbs 16:3]  I trust what the Word says, "If you are always trying to do good, no one can really harm you. But you may suffer for doing right. If that happens, you have God’s blessing. “Don’t be afraid of the people who make you suffer; don’t be worried." [1 Peter 3:13,14]

Someone told me that unconditional love isn't possible with man. That it's only God Who can love that way. I almost want to agree because of the difficulty in doing it. But, I am fully convinced that because Christ already won the victory, I too, am a victor. I only need to be strong in the Lord. Like what the Apostle Paul said, "I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live I live by believing in God's Son, who loved me and took the punishment for my sins." That's why Jesus said, "deny yourself and pick up your cross daily."  

  I will not allow defeat. I am not "of those who shrink back, but of those who have faith."

I can do all things through Christ Who gives me strength!

Toodles!

"LOVE doesn't come with conditions."

“Love isn't just about everything nice. It's more of sticking it out when it's hard...when you're mad...even when you're tired.” ― The Best Man

It's not always that I get to have long conversations with relatives. Twas an enlightening one Tuesday night spending hours with my aunts, cousin and mom. Was very happy to see my nephews, brother, sister and her husband after a while. Learned many things. I came to acquaint myself with my roots. Somehow, the talk opened my eyes to many other angles and sides I'd never seen before. I realized I had remained naive. Still too many facts about life I wasn't aware of.

Not that I just received everything as was fed to me. Yes, I am not gonna deny that everything made sense. Answered many questions I'd been searching to get. It's like the yak really meant to happen. For whatever reason it had to happen. And, am hoping it's rather beneficial than destructive to me.

So many things discussed which confused me about what lessons I have been learning from the Scriptures and God's wisdom. Shook the foundation that I thought already established strongly in my core. But, I am reminded of the Word... "the enemy only comes to steal, kill and destroy". Yes, that talk really had to happen but I won't let it be used against me. I have been graciously given the understanding of the Truth for me to fail. No, I will hold on to God's Truth not the world's.

The past was relived as we talked about dad. I had to keep reassuring them there's no resentment whatsoever left in my heart. Twas long gone. In fact, even before it sprung, I already pulled the weed. I have no ill feelings toward my father. Maybe, people simply have their own perceptions of things no matter how carefully words are chosen. 

There are so many things I can charge against my dad, if truth be told. I was denied the experience of having a father who could've nurtured my emotional needs, built my confidence, and given me assurance that I am loved not for the good I do but for everything that I am. It ached me for years that I put so much effort in making my dad appreciate me; yet, instead, I was consistently rejected, put down, neglected and ignored. Yes, I have all the reason to be angry and bitter. And, I think, the way he was to me did affect me big time. It caused me to fear a lot of things. It caused me to be negative and to shut my world off. I had more than enough rejections, that's already it! But, well, God has really been awesomely gracious to me. He intervened even before the ill feelings were allowed to sink in. I was healed. And, everything else that happened after -- all the experiences, failures, pain -- simply made me more wise, loving and understanding.

Love isn't really something to have, but something to DO. I realized that I was wrongly loving. I love my dad so much and all I ever focused on my entire younger years was to have his love, as well. No doubt he loves me, too. He's prolly just not good at expressing it nor verbalizing it. Thing is, I was loving with the hopes that I will HAVE his love, too. Eventually, it's taken its toll on me. I became tired because HAVING didn't seem possible. I came to a point when I don't anymore want to DO because I knew it's impossible to HAVE.

It's like those men who I consider without backbones. Those who are only testing the waters. They don't wanna DO. They just wanna HAVE. So, if they see no possibility of HAVING, no way they're gonna DO anything. Why waste effort? Why invest? Loving seems nothing but a business.

That gave me an alert during the long talkfest with my relatives. I heard the word DUTY. I heard someone said, "relationship is just like corporation". Love (as it appears) is nothing but an investment. Don't give if there's no return. Broke my heart.

I almost believed its benefits. It's enticing to take because life would be more comfortable and convenient like that. Think about yourself. Love yourself more. Keep everything -- even people and loved ones -- at a safe distance unless they prove they're worth all the efforts. If things get hard, just walk away. Sounds to me as if people are no different from objects. Get rid of them when they're not anymore useful. You gotta preserve your happiness and comfort because you're entitled to it. All these focus on SELF. Self-interest. Funny how even Bible verses are being twisted to justify selfish reasons. "Love your neighbors as yourself" is translated as, "love yourself first before you can give love...for you can't give what you don't have." 

How sad that relationships don't anymore matter as much as it should because God values His relationship with human race. No matter how insignificant people are, how useless...because they're foolish and wicked... God sees beauty in each one and He is more than driven to love them more without requirements. But, people? ...they give themselves all the right to qualify whether a person or persons should or should not be accepted. Imagine, we have the guts to say to another how they don't belong because they failed in meeting certain standards when we don't even meet God's standards!? Ridiculous.

But, there's one thing I came to realize about the phrases I heard during the late night yak. That as a Christian, I should be too careful not to believe the world anymore. That I should be inwardly transformed by the renewing of my mind. God didn't put me on Earth to be comfortable. He put me on Earth to share the suffering of Christ. And that means, I must deny myself...my feelings, my hurts, my rights, my opinion...my everything...for love and relationships. Many people out there don't know God and can't experience His love because they turned away from Him. I am among Christ's representatives walking on Earth to deliver that gift of love to those people. If I allow the world to influence me, I won't be of any use as Jesus' agent. There is no purpose for my existence anymore.

I am not OF the world; although, I am IN the world. I am the change the world needs. If it is to suffer for the sake of relationship and the salvation of people God is running after, then suffer it is. Relationship isn't about getting or having what I want. Relationship is about loving others because God loves them the same way as He loves every single soul in this world. Truly, those who don't love don't know God because they never experienced His love. They have not experienced HIM Who is Love.

Loving my neighbor as myself is treating them the same way I treat myself: I am very forgiving of myself. I excuse myself whenever I fail. I overlook my weaknesses. When I am hungry, I feed myself. When I hurt someone, I try hard not to keep blaming myself for my selfishness. I don't highlight my flaws. In fact, I magnify my virtues. ...just to give some examples. I strongly believe that if I am to love my neighbor as myself, I need to extend the same patience, love, understanding, forgiveness, etc. to them because that's the way I love myself. I can't love myself enough to be able to extend love to others. I NEED God to supply me that love so that I can extend love. It's only God Who can abundantly give everything that I need so I can be generous to others. It's not when I put myself first before others that will enable me to give. In fact, I'll sure be more wanting and greedy if that's how I do things. My wants will never end as I keep having. That's one of the lies the world feeds people even Christians. The Word encourages Christ's ambassadors to "never give up in doing good" because it gets tiring at some point. It gets really painful most of the time that giving up seems to be the best solution. However, it's not what God intends to happen. HE wants us to "finish the race" successfully.

I won't do anything for the sake of duty alone. I am not gonna keep treating people good because I know that's what I am called for. Maybe, it's a good start when love is not felt. But, it shouldn't be the reason for doing things. God isn't being gracious out of duty but out of love.

No arguments...it's hard to love people. It's exhausting. But, because God chooses to love me every time I fail...every time I sin...every time I act selfishly, I choose to live and walk in love, as well. I love because God first loved me.  

“Here is a simple rule of thumb for behavior: Ask yourself what you want people to do for you; then grab the initiative and do it for them! If you only love the lovable, do you expect a pat on the back? Run-of-the-mill sinners do that. If you only help those who help you, do you expect a medal? Garden-variety sinners do that. If you only give for what you hope to get out of it, do you think that’s charity? The stingiest of pawnbrokers does that.

“I tell you, love your enemies. Help and give without expecting a return. You’ll never—I promise—regret it. Live out this God-created identity the way our Father lives toward us, generously and graciously, even when we’re at our worst. Our Father is kind; you be kind.

“Don’t pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults—unless, of course, you want the same treatment. Don’t condemn those who are down; that hardness can boomerang. Be easy on people; you’ll find life a lot easier. Give away your life; you’ll find life given back, but not merely given back—given back with bonus and blessing. Giving, not getting, is the way. Generosity begets generosity.”  [Luke 6:31-38 MSG] 

Our job is to love people even when it hurts.

As I struggled to get myself to sleep just before lunchtime some time last month, a question dawned on me. Why would a loving God require His people to deny themselves --their rights, their feelings, their etc-- sacrifice and take all the pain? Isn't that deprivation? From the Prayer Meeting the night before that day, I even heard from a Pastor that God is our Heavenly Father. Would a father want his child to be in pain and take all the agony of self-denial? As far as I'm concerned, fathers even tell their kids to fight back when being bullied. So, why is God instructing His children to give the other cheek, forget about themselves and promote peace?

...and before I even start asking Him this question, He already answered me. The reason is because He wants His children to be just like Him. Just like His Son Jesus Christ. I realized how much people hurt Him every single second of each day by doing things that are against Him or hurtful to Him. But, He looks past almost everything. He tolerates and extends more and more patience because He loves His people. Just like what says in the Scriptures, "Love covers all offenses". God chooses to ignore every mistake, every wrongdoing, every sin...just to keep His relationship with His people. And He wants all His children to do the same because relationship for Him is more important than opinion, feelings...who's right or who's wrong...  

The Word tells us, "You are God’s dear children, so try to be like Him." (Ephesians 5:1, ERV)  In the Scriptures God says, "Be holy, because I am holy." (1 Peter 1:16, ERV)

It's unquestionably hard to extend forgiveness. There are even times when all we ever do is to wait for the person who wronged us to come to us and apologize for a wrong done before we can convince ourselves they ought to be forgiven. Then, there are even times, no matter how sorry the person already is, we still find it hard to pardon the offense. More often, even the doer of the misdeed. Forgiveness becomes more of a chore when we allow ourselves to justify the way we feel -- the hurt. We feel and it's excuse enough to continue dwelling in that episode when we're mistreated. And, there really is a ground for anger if you come to think of it. But, we can always choose to respond in a good way when angry. We don't always have to aggravate the situation. We don't always have to get even. We shouldn't always think of avenging ourselves.    

The apostle Paul asked this question "...Why not rather be wronged? Why not rather be cheated?" (1 Corinthians 6:7, NET)

Made me think. Easier said than done. Someone gossiped about you... stole something from you... lied to you ...physically assaulted you... and all you want is justice. Don't we all deserve justice? I believe we do. But, don't we also offend, provoke, agitate, annoy the people around us intentionally or unintentionally every so often? We can even madden anyone just by being us. When we insist on what we want, we already violate another being. Most of the time, it's the person closest to us who we antagonize more often. When there's relationship, misunderstanding is almost always not absent. And thing is it's not always intentional. It's just because relationship is hard. There are times we don't understand our own selves. How much more the other person we're relating with?

One of the disciplines I'd like to apply in my life is to understand that I am dealing with another person -- different persons...on a daily basis. A person with his/her own mind, decisions, feelings. I cannot impose on him/her what I want to happen. And it's not right for me to expect him/her to act or react, think, behave the same way I would at a given situation. I have to allow the person be who s/he is. That's his/her canvass. I have my own. And to deny him/her that privilege of living the way s/he wants is denying him/her individuality. God, Who is the Creator of everything here on Earth, does not even deny me my right to be me. When He gave me free will, He allowed me full access to it without questioning why my decisions are faulty. He just let's me be. He would nudge me from time to time and remind me whenever I misbehave but He doesn't insist on what He rather wants me to do. He is an All-Knowing God but He doesn't boss me around. So, who gives me (or anyone of us...mere humans) the right to act gods? To lord over anyone only because we think of ourselves better than others.

No, God isn't being hard on me when He tells me to deny myself. He only wants me to be more loving, to be more patient, to be more tolerant of the weaknesses of another being...because He treats me that way. And, if I am treated with kindness and gentleness ...which, in fact, I don't deserve...then, it's just but right that I extend that same grace. Otherwise, it's much better for me not to receive such treatment at all.

As I start and develop more relationships with people around me, I find it hard to follow Christ's command to "love my neighbors as myself". Esp, when I know that I am very critical of myself. I punish myself whenever I fail. And, when I know that I don't deliberately wrong anyone. When I am being careful not to hurt anyone's feelings. Somehow, I expect others to do the same. To do their own roles as Christians. But, then, as I am reminded that "none is righteous...not even one" I am helped. God's Truth always helps. We all have struggles. And, I believe that everyone is doing their best to be better individuals. It's just really hard when you're trying to change what is innate in you. It's like trying to be a flower when you're a bee.

God doesn't focus on my failures, weaknesses, trespasses... He even forgives readily when He sees my sorry heart even before I actually ask for forgiveness. And I feel His grace every time. So, even when it's hard, I strive to remain true to the Second Greatest Commandment because I know that Christ did His part so I can be part of His family. And if I belong to God's Kingdom, it must follow that I have the same fruit. Otherwise, I only prove that I don't really belong.

By saying, "why not rather be wronged" doesn't mean you're just gonna allow people to step on you. I don't think that is God's idea of how His children should be. It only means that Christians should respond in such a way that God is still gonna be glorified. 

Authentic Christianity is when 

a Christian values faith more than comfort.

Something to ponder about...   

True love requires sacrifice. 
God doesn’t call us to be comfortable.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“As Christians you should be like bridges to Heaven; letting people walk on you to get there.”

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

I'm not drunk ...I'm just intoxicated by you.

First time after decades am listening again to local radio station online and picked 90.7 Love Radio. Can't stop myself from laughing while listening to this DJ called "Papa Jack". Not really him but his caller, Evelyn. She's asking for advice about her hubby who has been away for yearsss to work abroad (Middle East) and never returned despite her incessant request for him to come back even for a short visit. I laughed my heart out when Papa Jack asked her when was the last time she talked with her husband. Her answer was, "next month" in her native accent. LOL

She also shared she once checked his husband's FaceBook account and found out he's been posting messages on a girl's page. When she confronted him, he got really angry at her.. He then, changed his password, according to Evelyn. She no longer can access his page and so is hers as they share the same "password". Just for emphasis sake, they share the same password not account and because he changed his, she can't anymore access hers! Hahaha

Laugh trip while at work helps my groggy state more than a cup of hot, rich and strong coffee.

Just sharing. hihihi  Am back, cyber friends!

...but, ta-ta for now. Gotta focus.