Choose: build something new and better from what is left or abandon it.

“Love chooses to believe the best about people. It gives them the benefit of the doubt.

It refuses to fill in the unknowns with negative assumptions. 

And when our worst hopes are proven to be true, love makes every effort to deal with them and move forward. 

As much as possible, love focuses on the positive.”
― The Love Dare  

 

Here typing my train-of-thoughts again...

 

You can try all you want to make someone see something that they don't want to see. Work with all your might to convince a person to realize what they need to realize. Just don't be surprised later on and end up frustrated when nothing's changed. You may have the best intention to help them improve their lives but the only thing you can really do is accept them exactly as they are today and love them for them. Love people for who they are and not for who you want them to be. If this is not all possible with you, let them go and let them find their own way, at their own pace, if they EVER choose to do so. Otherwise, you'll end up needlessly unhappy.

Once you notice yourself starting to get too focused on fixing a person ― every now and then looking for any trace of change or no change ― hold yourself back. You're not anymore loving. You're already trying to find reasons to love. But, since you find none (most of the time), you start collecting ill feelings. That's not healthy. When you begin the habit of nit-picking, you're only feeding yourself more reasons to justify your lack of love. It's, in fact, a sign there is no love or willingness to love. Might as well go some distance and take a break. If you think you can't find in your heart to accept a person, just choose to leave.

If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. ― Romans 12:18

 

Now, this is not me promoting self-interest here, but peace and harmony. If we end up expecting people to be how we want them to be and they refuse, we only set ourselves up to fail. And that means frustration. Frustrations translate to anger. Anger usually leads to bitterness. Before anything goes out of hand, might as well improve your state of mind or do damage control. That's all. 

 

I still believe that we ought to follow the two greatest commandments. Loving others as ourselves will really take a lot of pain before we master it. It's a discipline that requires lotsa flexing. We'll experience aches here and there. Because just like any discipline, we need to deny ourselves of certain things. If you don't want to fight, you need to shut your mouth and keep your hurt inside. You simply hafta mend your own broken heart. Things like that. But, if you're this kind of person who hoards, instead of letting go, it's not a good thing to solve the problem this way. Because it's just a matter of time and you'll explode. You're gonna be much worse than how you thought you are presently. We aren't supposed to be collectors of garbage but of collectible items. Sadly, many people seem to be so attracted to trash that they end up collecting them. 

 

Well, there's really no one rule for everything. It's not a one-size fits all thing. Just always choose the more beneficial one considering not only your own welfare but the welfare of others, too.       

Just saying...in case you find it impossible to really put up with loving the unlovable. Maybe, it's not yet your time. Maybe soon. But, until then, try saving yourself. Just make sure there's no negative feeling you're allowing to rent-free in your heart. Let go.

Good people who don’t stand strong against evil are like springs that have been polluted or pools that have turned dirty and muddy. ―Proverbs 25:26

Keeping it short...Ta-ta for now! ^_^