A world where rumors are a trend & truth is an afterthought.

"...in everything God works for the good of those who love HIM." Am so convinced this is true. This entire month and the month before, it's all been about things inexplicable. Many sad events happened. If I have no faith in God, I could've really been sucked alive by the tragedies I personally experienced and the tragedies of people close to me and other people I know. The mind always tries to find and give reasons to why things happen. But, there are times, answers aren't really needed. We only have to believe that whatever purpose there might be, it's all for the good no matter how it looks so bad. Live by faith NOT by sight.

...and to conclude this month, I'd like to share (not for the last time, don't celebrate!) about JUDGING others.  There have been numerous arguments about this topic ― personal views and opinion of people about this instruction from the Bible: DO NOT JUDGE (ref. Matthew 7:1-5, Luke 6:37). 

The command is obviously plain and simple if you come to think of it. It's a no-BUTs command. But, because people want to legitimize and excuse their acts, they'd refer to other scriptures/verses they can use. Like this one..."judge with right judgment." (John 7:24). Because they found a line that says it's ok to judge ONLY it should be "righteous judgment" they think they're given the ticket to do it. Am not claiming am a Bible expert or anything but I search for the Truth because I am inclined to throwing judgments, as well. It's sooo tempting especially when we're focusing on the lives of other people in stead of our own. I strongly believe that nobody has the right to judge. My basis...

God is the One who gave us the law, and He is the Judge. 
He is the only One Who can save and destroy. 
So it is not right for you to judge anyone. 
 ― James 4:12, ERV

True enough. Who could better judge righteously but the One Who gave the commandments? Besides, because of man's complexities and lack of knowledge and understanding, who can truly make right judgment? I mean, looking at an object then ask three people to describe it, you'll end up with different descriptions. We all have different perspective and views. And, it's basically why the commandment was given to us ― because our understanding and knowledge aren't the same as God's.  The Lord says, “My thoughts are not like yours. Your ways are not like Mine. (Isaiah 55:8). If that's the case, we could be wrong about what we think, see, or feel. People think that whatever they do is right, but the Lord judges the reasons for everything they do. (Proverbs 21:2) 

This explains why Jesus described the pharisees as hypocrites. They can easily hide their evil thoughts behind godly actions. Like I'd always say, it's easier to follow rules than be judged and be punished. People become too careful following a bunch of rules and they end up comparing themselves with other people whose sins are widely exposed. Indeed, like what the Word says,  

(Matthew 7:15) 

The Lord said, "These people claim to worship me, but their words are meaningless, and their hearts are somewhere else. Their religion is nothing but human rules and traditions, which they have simply memorized.        ― Isaiah 29:13 

Funny thing about religious people, they're the very ones who gossip a lot. They're the ones who make quick judgment. Once they see something with their eyes ... they rush to spread it like wildfire. Are we forgetting the Word also tells us, "Don’t be too quick to tell a judge about something you saw. You will be embarrassed if someone else proves you wrong." (Proverbs 25:8) 

We aren't with everyone round-the-clock. We don't have CCTVs that monitor what people are doing when they're not around us. God is the ONLY ONE Who is omnipresent so, only HE has the sole right to judge. Besides, God looks at the heart. He doesn't just focus on actions. That's why He called the pharisees  HYPOCRITES. They're doing all the good stuff, but inside them are bad stuff. They show off they know the Law but did not really do what the Law requires based on God's intention. And, because they're very careful in observing the Law, they were too quick to pass judgment on others to give themselves credit for the good work they'd done.

Many people, especially religious ones, these days are like those pharisees who are so good in doing ministries and acts of service to show they're better than others, which they use as tickets to pass judgment on others who sin differently than they do. Not considering that they, too, have so many issues to deal with. They end up weighing which sin is more evil. If theirs is lesser evil, that's already enough reason for them to condemn another. By this they're disregarding another Truth from the Word: "if we break anything stated in the Law, we break all."  (James 2:10) So, it doesn't matter whether your sin is just cheating and another's murder. Let's understand that that's mainly the purpose why Jesus had to walk on Earth and die on our behalf ― because NONE is capable of fulfilling ALL what the Law requires. All have sin and fall short of the glory of God! ALL. So, for crying out loud, can we ALL excuse fellow Christians we think are falling short and say the same things we're using as excuses whenever we fall short?!  Some overheard lines are: "I thank God for His mercies are new every morning..."I thank Jesus for saving me because I can't save myself." If someone we know sins, we can say the same things and trust that God is working in their lives, as well.

Sadly, though, many are hiding behind their closets. They're so good and pleasant when around other people but inside their homes, inside their rooms...in their hearts...what really is there? Who really are they? In fact, being too itchy to judge another already proves what tree they are for the Word says, "You will know the tree by its fruit." Did Jesus ever gossip or slander anyone? The Bible tells us, If we say we live in God, we must live the way Jesus lived. (1 John 2:6) Jesus, Himself, even said... I don’t judge anyone. But if I judge, My judging is true, because when I judge I am not alone. The Father who sent Me is with Me. (John 8:15-16)  That's Jesus, Himself, talking!!!

When Jesus bumped into this woman by the well (ref John 4), He knew what kind of life she's living. He even said her story accurately. But, HE did NOT judge the woman by telling her she's immoral or anything like that. And, definitely, HE did not go and told His disciples or others about her wrongs. In stead, HE ministered to that woman, showed real concern for her, which caused her to repent and change her ways. The Bible shows us Jesus' example. Why aren't we imitating Him? 

I believe that if one is living by the Spirit, s/he will do as Jesus Christ did, in stead of judging/condemning. We're all sinners. Christians are saints who sin because that's human nature. Everyone is in the flesh. So, when one falters, we need to help them up and not pull them down more by judging them. Brothers and sisters, someone in your group might do something wrong. You who are following the Spirit should go to the one who is sinning. Help make that person right again, and do it in a gentle way. But be careful, because you might be tempted to sin too. (Galatians 6:1) This was given as an exhortation because we all have the tendency to be tempted and fall. For NONE is righteous (Romans 3:10).  Left alone to ourselves, we will choose to do wrong, which is why we are encouraged to abide in Christ. 

It's so funny how we're always telling each other "HE Who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it..." yet, whenever a brother or a sister fails, we readily judge. We even tell everyone about how wrong they are and then stay away from that brother or sister. How about Apostle Paul's struggle? ― I don’t understand why I act the way I do. I don’t do the good I want to do, and I do the evil I hate.  What if a sinning brother or sister is also having that same struggle? Can't we simply let God work in the person's life, in stead? 

And are we not realizing that God's answer to Paul's plea to remove the "thorn in his flesh" was to help him be strong in the Lord and to keep him humble? The Apostle Paul said...But I must not be too proud of the wonderful things that were shown to me. So a painful problem was given to me—an angel from Satan, sent to make me suffer, so that I would not think that I am better than anyone else. I begged the Lord three times to take this problem away from me. But the Lord said, “My grace is all you need. Only when you are weak can everything be done completely by my power.” So I will gladly boast about my weaknesses. Then Christ’s power can stay in me.  (2 Corinthians 12:7-9)

Clearly, everyone...especially...Christians will undergo so many challenges in this world to test what they're really made of. God will always discipline us, mold us, prune us because HE wants us to be like His Son Jesus. God will strip us off our flesh and that can really be tough. Not at all times, we're gonna be strong enough to resist sin because when it gets hard, we are inclined to go back feeding the flesh. Some people struggle with temper, others lust, others drunkenness, some others much worse...some others really petty. Still, the bottom line is, we are being dealt with our own personal flaws and issues. If God is allowing each one of us our own pace to change, can't we be as gracious to allow each other's pace? 

You cannot judge the servants of someone else. 
Their own master decides if they are doing right or wrong. 
And the Lord’s servants will be right, 
because the Lord is able to make them right.
―Romans 14:4

Most of the time, there are really tangible and well-grounded evidences and facts that can't be ignored. It's true. But, they're still not enough grounds to conclude, assume and esp judge and condemn. Again, we only know very little to make judgments because we judge externally. God judges what's in our hearts. God doesn't only focus on the ACT, but the MOTIVES behind. 

Going back to John 7:24 - "judge with right judgment."... which in another version goes like this...stop judging by the way things look. Be fair and judge by what is really right ... we are being taught to not judge at all because like what Jesus gave as an illustration how the pharisees were following the Law of Moses ― about keeping the Sabbath holy and yet did circumcision on Sabbath then condemned Jesus that HE's healing on a Sabbath ― makes them manipulators of the Law. (Just like what Isaiah 29:13 says about them.) So, it appears this way ―  when they're the ones doing what the Law says they shouldn't do, it's acceptable. But, if it's someone else (in that case, Jesus) it's so WRONG.

Many are like this nowadays. They see the speck in another's eyes but can't see the log in their own eyes. They're unforgiving of the sins of their brothers while they're so forgiving of their own sins. In fact, if you're just really gonna be legalistic about the command: keep the Sabbath holy, both the pharisees and Jesus broke the Law, isn't it? It only teaches us that there are things, which in our petty judgment, are completely wrong that may not be wrong at all because it's not ONLY the act that God looks at but the motive. Also, we should remind ourselves of God's sovereignty. He ordained everything. And the following passages speak a lot about it:

God said to Moses, “I will show mercy to anyone I want to show mercy to. I will show pity to anyone I choose.” So God will choose anyone he decides to show mercy to, and his choice does not depend on what people want or try to do. In the Scriptures God says to Pharaoh: “I made you king so that you could do this for me. I wanted to show my power through you. I wanted my name to be announced throughout the world.” So God shows mercy to those he wants to show mercy to and makes stubborn those he wants to make stubborn.

 

So one of you will ask me, “If God controls what we do, why does he blame us for our sins?” Don’t ask that. You are only human and have no right to question God. A clay jar does not question the one who made it. It does not say, “Why did you make me like this?” The one who makes the jar can make anything he wants. He uses the same clay to make different things. He might make one thing for special purposes and another for daily use.  ― Romans 9:15-21

God has all the right to every person whatever He might purposed them to be. We are not to question another person's design. DO NOT JUDGE. We are all instructed to LOVE one another not to judge one another. God doesn't want us to change each other because that is HIS job not ours. We have made ourselves gods telling God how each one is malfunctioning in stead of saying, "God, I am malfunctioning. Please fix me."

Apostle Paul also said...

...I don’t consider your judgment on this point to be worth anything. Even an opinion from a court of law would mean nothing. I don’t even trust my own judgment. I don’t know of any wrong I have done, but that does not make me right. The Lord is the one who must decide if I have done well or not. So, don’t judge anyone now. The time for judging will be when the Lord comes. He will shine light on everything that is now hidden in darkness. He will make known the secret purposes of our hearts. Then the praise each person should get will come from God. ―1 Corinthians 4:3-5

Now, with all that I said, I must not ignore another passage that encourages Christians to judge problems between believers found in 1 Corinthians 6:1-3, When one of you has something against someone else in your group, why do you go to the judges in the law courts? The way they think and live is wrong. So why do you let them decide who is right? Why don’t you let God’s holy people decide who is right? Don’t you know that God’s people will judge the world? So if you will judge the world, then surely you can judge small arguments like this. You know that in the future we will judge angels. So surely we can judge life’s ordinary problems.

Let's not take the above passages out of context. Clearly, it talks about resolving conflicts between two people WITH the intention of restoring relationships. In the next passages, in fact, are exhortations to simply forgive and let go. Compare this to JUST judging with the wrong motives, with pride and arrogance, and without trying to restore the person doing wrong. Problem with many religious people, they judge, criticize and gossip with no intention of helping the person erring. See the difference? So many people look at another person as if they're so filthy and beyond cure forgetting that they, too, are still also sinning only in a different way. Thinking so highly of themselves. Just like the pharisees!!! 

So, if you aren't doing anything to help a sinning brother or sister and have no guts and intention to do so, better shut your mouth and stop doing wrong or else you, too, will be JUDGED!

~~~~~~~~~~~~

The steps of a person are ordained by the Lord—

so how can anyone understand his own way?  

―Proverbs 20:24

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~

 "Before you judge someone else, stop and think about all that God has forgiven you for."

 

  

Don't be critics and point out flaws in God's art.

Countless people are crushed inside themselves and live without hope these days. Many of them think that the world is nothing but an ugly place. That life is unfair. A lot see themselves as the world's rejects. But, I don't bite at this. It's not really the place that causes pain and misery. It's what's in it. Storm comes, yes. But, if only we function in love and compassion, storms could be easier to bear. In stead of pointing fingers and highlighting the wrongs of others...in stead of being indifferent and taking no accountability for the life of another... if only people walk in love... the world could've been a nicer place to live in.  

What's wrong is that many people... even close friends and many Christians... harbor so much hate, envy, jealousy, selfishness, and all other trash in their system and then talk about others behind their back. They stop coming around you, avoid you...do spiritual quarantine; or the least, fake smiles, conversations and niceness...in stead, of telling you what they think is wrong with you or whatever you might have done which offended them. Then, they go to Church every Sunday clapping, shouting, singing and acting their best to show they're good people.

It seems that people have found ways to kill or torture others, not physically, but with their words, animosity, hostility, indifference, judgment, criticisms, slander, hatred, bitterness, jealousy, envy...and all the many trash they hide inside themselves they use as spears. All those baggage should be let go rather than be used as weapons against each other. True enough... HURT PEOPLE HURT PEOPLE.

Be very careful not to use the Bible to your benefit...to manipulate people... and then ignore the parts in there that point to your wrongs. Like, "do not judge", "do not slander" ...especially, without really knowing the person or what really happened.

If anyone thinks himself to be piously observant of the external duties of his faith yet does not control his tongue but deludes his own heart, this person’s religious service is worthless. [James 1:26]

Remember this: There are some terrible times coming in the last days. People will love only themselves and money. They will be proud and boast about themselves. They will abuse others with insults. They will not obey their parents. They will be ungrateful and against all that is pleasing to God. They will have no love for others and will refuse to forgive anyone. They will talk about others to hurt them and will have no self-control. They will be cruel and hate what is good. People will turn against their friends. They will do foolish things without thinking and will be so proud of themselves. Instead of loving God, they will love pleasure. They will go on pretending to be devoted to God, but they will refuse to let that “devotion” change the way they live. Stay away from these people! [2 Timothy 3:1-5]

There is no other commandment highly emphasized by Jesus but these two:

‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind. This is the first and most important command. And the second command is like the first: Love your neighbor the same as you love yourself.’  [Matthew 22:37-40]

Whoever is of God loves because God is love. Love causes one not to do bad to others.

FAKE is the trend and so many are in STYLE!

To every person who gossiped about me; to everyone who tries to be close to me to know my story only to tell the world of it in a malicious manner; to the close-minded; to the judgmental and critic; to friends who turned out to be backstabbers; to those who envy and compete; and, to those who "secretly" keep their dislike or hatred toward me yet smile at and talk nicely to me: 

You all challenge me to become a better person. You all turn me into a stronger and wiser woman. For all that you have done -- no matter how bad and hurtful... you've unknowingly done so much in favor of me. For that, I THANK you ALL.

I share the same sentiment King David had...

If it were an enemy making fun of me, I could endure it; if it were an opponent boasting over me, I could hide myself from him. But it is you, my companion, my colleague and close friend.  We had intimate talks with each other and worshiped together in the Temple. [Psalm 55:12]

And this, my best friend, betrayed his best friends;
    his life betrayed his word.
All my life I’ve been charmed by his speech,
    never dreaming he’d turn on me.
His words, which were music to my ears,
    turned to daggers in my heart.  [v. 20-21]

 ~~~~~~~~~~

 You might call many people your “friends,”but it is hard to find someone who can really be TRUSTED. [Proverbs 20:6, ERV]

Evil people say things to make themselves look good,
but they keep their evil plans a secret.
What they say sounds good, but don’t trust them.
They are full of evil ideas. They hide their evil plans with nice words,
but in the end, everyone will see the evil they do.
Liars hate the people they hurt, and false praise can hurt people.
[Proverbs 26:24-28]

It's truly helpful to not EXPECT from anyone. You'll be so surprised to know ...the people you thought are sincere friends are the very ones who "secretly" hate you for whatever reasons you won't ever fathom. They are worse than enemies because they always try to inflict pain in ways unimaginable while you're unsuspiciously giving your trust. It's simply frustrating how no matter you give the best that you can...the best that you have...it'll never suffice. Some friends hide behind smiles but their hearts are filled with inexplicable animosity. You may arrive at different conclusions and try to fix what might be wrong with you, but the truth is, you will never be able to satisfy them because they're really not your friends right from the beginning, in the first place. Sad but true.

And, I learned this truth the hard way...

 

Not because I choose to do right I can expect others to do the same. I realized that I can only be responsible for my own behavior and attitude. I will never have any influence in another's. It's their choice. And, unless they resolve in their hearts to release animosity, hatred, bitterness, envy, and all other negative feelings they choose to nurture... I can never expect them to be considerate of my feelings. There's emptiness, hunger and thirst within them, which no matter how I try to fill will never be satisfied. I am not the solution. My solutions aren't gonna help either. I can try and try to be better as a friend, as a person...but, it is not I who can arrange what's messy in them. They need to drop the ill feelings -- hatred, jealousy, hostility, etc. -- first and experience God's love, mercy and grace. 

The world yells, "leave those who only cause you misery...and stick to the ones who give you more love and inspiration".  Tempting to consider, huh?! Very convenient. But, self-seeking. Opposite of what the Word says, "bear with the failings of the weak" (Romans 15:1) and "do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others." (Philippians 2:4)

Yes, I can't do anything about the way they feel about me...about the way they treat me. They may decide to stay fake all they want. But, I can't give up LOVING. It's so true...you'll only know that you love when you sacrifice. You sacrifice your own feelings for the good of another. I can't deny that loving those who hide their hatred behind fake friendship is PAINFUL. It truly is. And, there are times I simply feel like running away from them because I am so aware of the harm they intend to inflict. Just, how can I deny them love when God didn't deny His love from me even I don't deserve it? How can I choose to give up on people when God never thought of giving up on me? God knows my innermost thoughts. God knows I am inclined to choose things that hurt Him. Still, HE chooses to love me over and over and over...............

The command to "love your enemies" is indeed challenging. But, it's more tough to love a friend who betrays. Yet, the best contribution you can impart to anyone, esp the unlovable, is unconditional love. Because they need it most when they least deserve it. If I won't choose to love them in their worst state, who will? Yes, God will. But, how can they experience God if not through me? Christians are vessels of God's love, compassion, mercy, forgiveness...and all the good stuff. And as a Christian, I can't decide who should and should not receive any good stuff when they're in God's list of recipients. I have no right to skip anyone only because they're harmful.

So all of you should live together in peace.Try to understand each other. Love each other like brothers and sisters. Be kind and humble.  Don’t do wrong to anyone to pay them back for doing wrong to you. Or don’t insult anyone to pay them back for insulting you. But ask God to bless them. Do this because you yourselves were chosen to receive a blessing.

The Scriptures say,
“If you want to enjoy true life and have only good days,  then avoid saying anything hurtful, and never let a lie come out of your mouth.  [1 Peter 3:8-10 ERV]

I just place my confidence in one thing: "The Lord sees what happens everywhere. He watches everyone, good and evil." [Proverbs 15:3]  All I have to do is to "Turn to the Lord for help in everything you do, and you will be successful." [Proverbs 16:3]  I trust what the Word says, "If you are always trying to do good, no one can really harm you. But you may suffer for doing right. If that happens, you have God’s blessing. “Don’t be afraid of the people who make you suffer; don’t be worried." [1 Peter 3:13,14]

Someone told me that unconditional love isn't possible with man. That it's only God Who can love that way. I almost want to agree because of the difficulty in doing it. But, I am fully convinced that because Christ already won the victory, I too, am a victor. I only need to be strong in the Lord. Like what the Apostle Paul said, "I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live I live by believing in God's Son, who loved me and took the punishment for my sins." That's why Jesus said, "deny yourself and pick up your cross daily."  

  I will not allow defeat. I am not "of those who shrink back, but of those who have faith."

I can do all things through Christ Who gives me strength!

Toodles!

"LOVE doesn't come with conditions."

“Love isn't just about everything nice. It's more of sticking it out when it's hard...when you're mad...even when you're tired.” ― The Best Man

It's not always that I get to have long conversations with relatives. Twas an enlightening one Tuesday night spending hours with my aunts, cousin and mom. Was very happy to see my nephews, brother, sister and her husband after a while. Learned many things. I came to acquaint myself with my roots. Somehow, the talk opened my eyes to many other angles and sides I'd never seen before. I realized I had remained naive. Still too many facts about life I wasn't aware of.

Not that I just received everything as was fed to me. Yes, I am not gonna deny that everything made sense. Answered many questions I'd been searching to get. It's like the yak really meant to happen. For whatever reason it had to happen. And, am hoping it's rather beneficial than destructive to me.

So many things discussed which confused me about what lessons I have been learning from the Scriptures and God's wisdom. Shook the foundation that I thought already established strongly in my core. But, I am reminded of the Word... "the enemy only comes to steal, kill and destroy". Yes, that talk really had to happen but I won't let it be used against me. I have been graciously given the understanding of the Truth for me to fail. No, I will hold on to God's Truth not the world's.

The past was relived as we talked about dad. I had to keep reassuring them there's no resentment whatsoever left in my heart. Twas long gone. In fact, even before it sprung, I already pulled the weed. I have no ill feelings toward my father. Maybe, people simply have their own perceptions of things no matter how carefully words are chosen. 

There are so many things I can charge against my dad, if truth be told. I was denied the experience of having a father who could've nurtured my emotional needs, built my confidence, and given me assurance that I am loved not for the good I do but for everything that I am. It ached me for years that I put so much effort in making my dad appreciate me; yet, instead, I was consistently rejected, put down, neglected and ignored. Yes, I have all the reason to be angry and bitter. And, I think, the way he was to me did affect me big time. It caused me to fear a lot of things. It caused me to be negative and to shut my world off. I had more than enough rejections, that's already it! But, well, God has really been awesomely gracious to me. He intervened even before the ill feelings were allowed to sink in. I was healed. And, everything else that happened after -- all the experiences, failures, pain -- simply made me more wise, loving and understanding.

Love isn't really something to have, but something to DO. I realized that I was wrongly loving. I love my dad so much and all I ever focused on my entire younger years was to have his love, as well. No doubt he loves me, too. He's prolly just not good at expressing it nor verbalizing it. Thing is, I was loving with the hopes that I will HAVE his love, too. Eventually, it's taken its toll on me. I became tired because HAVING didn't seem possible. I came to a point when I don't anymore want to DO because I knew it's impossible to HAVE.

It's like those men who I consider without backbones. Those who are only testing the waters. They don't wanna DO. They just wanna HAVE. So, if they see no possibility of HAVING, no way they're gonna DO anything. Why waste effort? Why invest? Loving seems nothing but a business.

That gave me an alert during the long talkfest with my relatives. I heard the word DUTY. I heard someone said, "relationship is just like corporation". Love (as it appears) is nothing but an investment. Don't give if there's no return. Broke my heart.

I almost believed its benefits. It's enticing to take because life would be more comfortable and convenient like that. Think about yourself. Love yourself more. Keep everything -- even people and loved ones -- at a safe distance unless they prove they're worth all the efforts. If things get hard, just walk away. Sounds to me as if people are no different from objects. Get rid of them when they're not anymore useful. You gotta preserve your happiness and comfort because you're entitled to it. All these focus on SELF. Self-interest. Funny how even Bible verses are being twisted to justify selfish reasons. "Love your neighbors as yourself" is translated as, "love yourself first before you can give love...for you can't give what you don't have." 

How sad that relationships don't anymore matter as much as it should because God values His relationship with human race. No matter how insignificant people are, how useless...because they're foolish and wicked... God sees beauty in each one and He is more than driven to love them more without requirements. But, people? ...they give themselves all the right to qualify whether a person or persons should or should not be accepted. Imagine, we have the guts to say to another how they don't belong because they failed in meeting certain standards when we don't even meet God's standards!? Ridiculous.

But, there's one thing I came to realize about the phrases I heard during the late night yak. That as a Christian, I should be too careful not to believe the world anymore. That I should be inwardly transformed by the renewing of my mind. God didn't put me on Earth to be comfortable. He put me on Earth to share the suffering of Christ. And that means, I must deny myself...my feelings, my hurts, my rights, my opinion...my everything...for love and relationships. Many people out there don't know God and can't experience His love because they turned away from Him. I am among Christ's representatives walking on Earth to deliver that gift of love to those people. If I allow the world to influence me, I won't be of any use as Jesus' agent. There is no purpose for my existence anymore.

I am not OF the world; although, I am IN the world. I am the change the world needs. If it is to suffer for the sake of relationship and the salvation of people God is running after, then suffer it is. Relationship isn't about getting or having what I want. Relationship is about loving others because God loves them the same way as He loves every single soul in this world. Truly, those who don't love don't know God because they never experienced His love. They have not experienced HIM Who is Love.

Loving my neighbor as myself is treating them the same way I treat myself: I am very forgiving of myself. I excuse myself whenever I fail. I overlook my weaknesses. When I am hungry, I feed myself. When I hurt someone, I try hard not to keep blaming myself for my selfishness. I don't highlight my flaws. In fact, I magnify my virtues. ...just to give some examples. I strongly believe that if I am to love my neighbor as myself, I need to extend the same patience, love, understanding, forgiveness, etc. to them because that's the way I love myself. I can't love myself enough to be able to extend love to others. I NEED God to supply me that love so that I can extend love. It's only God Who can abundantly give everything that I need so I can be generous to others. It's not when I put myself first before others that will enable me to give. In fact, I'll sure be more wanting and greedy if that's how I do things. My wants will never end as I keep having. That's one of the lies the world feeds people even Christians. The Word encourages Christ's ambassadors to "never give up in doing good" because it gets tiring at some point. It gets really painful most of the time that giving up seems to be the best solution. However, it's not what God intends to happen. HE wants us to "finish the race" successfully.

I won't do anything for the sake of duty alone. I am not gonna keep treating people good because I know that's what I am called for. Maybe, it's a good start when love is not felt. But, it shouldn't be the reason for doing things. God isn't being gracious out of duty but out of love.

No arguments...it's hard to love people. It's exhausting. But, because God chooses to love me every time I fail...every time I sin...every time I act selfishly, I choose to live and walk in love, as well. I love because God first loved me.  

“Here is a simple rule of thumb for behavior: Ask yourself what you want people to do for you; then grab the initiative and do it for them! If you only love the lovable, do you expect a pat on the back? Run-of-the-mill sinners do that. If you only help those who help you, do you expect a medal? Garden-variety sinners do that. If you only give for what you hope to get out of it, do you think that’s charity? The stingiest of pawnbrokers does that.

“I tell you, love your enemies. Help and give without expecting a return. You’ll never—I promise—regret it. Live out this God-created identity the way our Father lives toward us, generously and graciously, even when we’re at our worst. Our Father is kind; you be kind.

“Don’t pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults—unless, of course, you want the same treatment. Don’t condemn those who are down; that hardness can boomerang. Be easy on people; you’ll find life a lot easier. Give away your life; you’ll find life given back, but not merely given back—given back with bonus and blessing. Giving, not getting, is the way. Generosity begets generosity.”  [Luke 6:31-38 MSG] 

Our job is to love people even when it hurts.

As I struggled to get myself to sleep just before lunchtime some time last month, a question dawned on me. Why would a loving God require His people to deny themselves --their rights, their feelings, their etc-- sacrifice and take all the pain? Isn't that deprivation? From the Prayer Meeting the night before that day, I even heard from a Pastor that God is our Heavenly Father. Would a father want his child to be in pain and take all the agony of self-denial? As far as I'm concerned, fathers even tell their kids to fight back when being bullied. So, why is God instructing His children to give the other cheek, forget about themselves and promote peace?

...and before I even start asking Him this question, He already answered me. The reason is because He wants His children to be just like Him. Just like His Son Jesus Christ. I realized how much people hurt Him every single second of each day by doing things that are against Him or hurtful to Him. But, He looks past almost everything. He tolerates and extends more and more patience because He loves His people. Just like what says in the Scriptures, "Love covers all offenses". God chooses to ignore every mistake, every wrongdoing, every sin...just to keep His relationship with His people. And He wants all His children to do the same because relationship for Him is more important than opinion, feelings...who's right or who's wrong...  

The Word tells us, "You are God’s dear children, so try to be like Him." (Ephesians 5:1, ERV)  In the Scriptures God says, "Be holy, because I am holy." (1 Peter 1:16, ERV)

It's unquestionably hard to extend forgiveness. There are even times when all we ever do is to wait for the person who wronged us to come to us and apologize for a wrong done before we can convince ourselves they ought to be forgiven. Then, there are even times, no matter how sorry the person already is, we still find it hard to pardon the offense. More often, even the doer of the misdeed. Forgiveness becomes more of a chore when we allow ourselves to justify the way we feel -- the hurt. We feel and it's excuse enough to continue dwelling in that episode when we're mistreated. And, there really is a ground for anger if you come to think of it. But, we can always choose to respond in a good way when angry. We don't always have to aggravate the situation. We don't always have to get even. We shouldn't always think of avenging ourselves.    

The apostle Paul asked this question "...Why not rather be wronged? Why not rather be cheated?" (1 Corinthians 6:7, NET)

Made me think. Easier said than done. Someone gossiped about you... stole something from you... lied to you ...physically assaulted you... and all you want is justice. Don't we all deserve justice? I believe we do. But, don't we also offend, provoke, agitate, annoy the people around us intentionally or unintentionally every so often? We can even madden anyone just by being us. When we insist on what we want, we already violate another being. Most of the time, it's the person closest to us who we antagonize more often. When there's relationship, misunderstanding is almost always not absent. And thing is it's not always intentional. It's just because relationship is hard. There are times we don't understand our own selves. How much more the other person we're relating with?

One of the disciplines I'd like to apply in my life is to understand that I am dealing with another person -- different persons...on a daily basis. A person with his/her own mind, decisions, feelings. I cannot impose on him/her what I want to happen. And it's not right for me to expect him/her to act or react, think, behave the same way I would at a given situation. I have to allow the person be who s/he is. That's his/her canvass. I have my own. And to deny him/her that privilege of living the way s/he wants is denying him/her individuality. God, Who is the Creator of everything here on Earth, does not even deny me my right to be me. When He gave me free will, He allowed me full access to it without questioning why my decisions are faulty. He just let's me be. He would nudge me from time to time and remind me whenever I misbehave but He doesn't insist on what He rather wants me to do. He is an All-Knowing God but He doesn't boss me around. So, who gives me (or anyone of us...mere humans) the right to act gods? To lord over anyone only because we think of ourselves better than others.

No, God isn't being hard on me when He tells me to deny myself. He only wants me to be more loving, to be more patient, to be more tolerant of the weaknesses of another being...because He treats me that way. And, if I am treated with kindness and gentleness ...which, in fact, I don't deserve...then, it's just but right that I extend that same grace. Otherwise, it's much better for me not to receive such treatment at all.

As I start and develop more relationships with people around me, I find it hard to follow Christ's command to "love my neighbors as myself". Esp, when I know that I am very critical of myself. I punish myself whenever I fail. And, when I know that I don't deliberately wrong anyone. When I am being careful not to hurt anyone's feelings. Somehow, I expect others to do the same. To do their own roles as Christians. But, then, as I am reminded that "none is righteous...not even one" I am helped. God's Truth always helps. We all have struggles. And, I believe that everyone is doing their best to be better individuals. It's just really hard when you're trying to change what is innate in you. It's like trying to be a flower when you're a bee.

God doesn't focus on my failures, weaknesses, trespasses... He even forgives readily when He sees my sorry heart even before I actually ask for forgiveness. And I feel His grace every time. So, even when it's hard, I strive to remain true to the Second Greatest Commandment because I know that Christ did His part so I can be part of His family. And if I belong to God's Kingdom, it must follow that I have the same fruit. Otherwise, I only prove that I don't really belong.

By saying, "why not rather be wronged" doesn't mean you're just gonna allow people to step on you. I don't think that is God's idea of how His children should be. It only means that Christians should respond in such a way that God is still gonna be glorified. 

Authentic Christianity is when 

a Christian values faith more than comfort.

Something to ponder about...   

True love requires sacrifice. 
God doesn’t call us to be comfortable.

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“As Christians you should be like bridges to Heaven; letting people walk on you to get there.”

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I'm not drunk ...I'm just intoxicated by you.

First time after decades am listening again to local radio station online and picked 90.7 Love Radio. Can't stop myself from laughing while listening to this DJ called "Papa Jack". Not really him but his caller, Evelyn. She's asking for advice about her hubby who has been away for yearsss to work abroad (Middle East) and never returned despite her incessant request for him to come back even for a short visit. I laughed my heart out when Papa Jack asked her when was the last time she talked with her husband. Her answer was, "next month" in her native accent. LOL

She also shared she once checked his husband's FaceBook account and found out he's been posting messages on a girl's page. When she confronted him, he got really angry at her.. He then, changed his password, according to Evelyn. She no longer can access his page and so is hers as they share the same "password". Just for emphasis sake, they share the same password not account and because he changed his, she can't anymore access hers! Hahaha

Laugh trip while at work helps my groggy state more than a cup of hot, rich and strong coffee.

Just sharing. hihihi  Am back, cyber friends!

...but, ta-ta for now. Gotta focus.

Refinement Creates Beauty

Three days from now, it's already another year. Imagine that. Time passes by so fast. Twas like only yesterday when 2012 came. Now it's 2013 soon. Actually, I didn't really feel the festivities and all even though I had attended a few celebrations... I wasn't really able to feel the spirit. But, I know it's also a decision to choose to be thankful and, in my heart, I really am. Just, I can't deny how things are really shaking me right now. Sometimes, I just wanna wake up in a different world. I wanna wake up a different person.

Well, it's been a roller coaster ride this year, I must say. There had been answered prayers and still more unanswered. But, hey! Isn't it what gives excitement to life? Yeah, I can't deny I have many regrets, which I hope will be replaced by thanksgiving, in stead. I want my attitude to be right. God is building me up and I must not anymore resist. Seriously, it's tough, but nothing isn't. I talk about perspective and I simply wanna have a better one. God help me.

After nagging to God, He finally gave me what I was asking for early this year. He gave it just when things aren't really going so well anymore, ironically. Something that doesn't make sense to me. Or, could be I still am doing something not right. But, am really sure, it's really His answer to my years of nagging. Why in the most inconvenient time, I dunno. Still am thankful. And, He's really been generously gracious to me. So gracious I can't thank Him enough. But, more than anything, I am thankful for the wisdom that He's imparting to me with every situation that comes my way. That, in everything, He works for my good. Nothing but my good.

There's really not a lot that I can list down He granted me this year but I guess it's because I am focusing on what I was expecting to receive. So, I acknowledge even those that came unexpectedly ― small and big things alike. Just, I find it really tough to be pruned and molded at the same time. He's teaching me so much. Or, maybe, He's got no choice but to keep shooting lessons at me because I was too insistent to make things happen as I wish.  And, I know that He's been talking to me and He's really given me wisdom, knowledge and everything to equip me. Maybe, most of the time, I stay deaf or I act deaf. Am not sure. Or, could be, I am often shrugging off His instructions and reminders because I want to please myself. I can so relate to the Israelites! LOL

One of the things I have been taught was to trust Him not men. I guess for quite some time I simply relied on people. I am praying and praying and yet the voices of the people around me echo more to my ears and they're who I follow. Am in this tug-o-war of trusting either God or man. One of my biggest challenges, I must say. Not that I consider people better than God. Of course, I am not that nuts to think so. Maybe it's also pride that I am sure my judgment is good because God gave me a gift of sound judgment so I am confident that who I choose to trust is truly reliable. Still, it isn't right.  Through the years, God has been jealous because I seem to give more weight to what others feel and think more than what He feels and thinks. And, I know how I am hurting Him. At least now it's very clear to me. Thanks to His wisdom. And thanks that He opened my eyes to this fact about me which is something I wasn't really taking with a straight face. And, yeah, although I already know doesn't mean it's gonna be plain sailing to change. Still His grace is what I need.

Another thing is to be ALWAYS thankful. Whatever circumstance. That I shouldn't allow my situation control and influence my joy. This is something really tough. At times, I'd even end up wishing I was still the old me when I was just taking everything as they come. Growing up in a family where dad's strict, I learned obedience without complain. Twas natural for me to just follow and accept whatever comes. I wasn't always happy, of course. But, at least, I wasn't grumbling. There was the childlike faith that they only wanted the best for me. That's when I was still dependent on everything they have to say. I wish I never learned independence. However, staying the same won't allow me any progress. This was the answer I got from God when I asked Him, why He even had to allow me independence. Twas way better when I was not self-governing. Often, I'd wish I were still a child ― no need to make decisions, no responsibilities, no worries. I find it more convenient. Then, it dawned on me, I was looking at my Egypt. God is leading me to my Promised Land and I am staring back at my Egypt where I feel my comfort is in. God is equipping me more and more that's why I gotta embrace change. And it includes me having to make my own decisions, face the consequences of what decisions I make ― right or wrong ― without pointing fingers at and owning up all the bad ones. I can't emphasize enough, though, how terrible these are all happening at the same time in this season of my life. All I can help myself with is to consistently remind myself that a puzzle won't be complete without the smaller pieces. Each piece don't make sense...don't look pretty...on their own but creates a wonderful portrait with the rest of the other pieces. Like an ingredient, such as cumin, paprika, turmeric... don't taste nice unless mixed with the rest of the other ingredients to make a recipe. So is everything that happens to me may not make sense at the moment especially when heartache is involved, but I am sure they're all adornments to beautify my character in God's time. God's wisdom is truly awesome and I am so thankful He is lavishing me with much of it although I, most of the time, end up misusing or ignoring it. How wonderful is that?!

When I was a child, I wasn't complaining a lot. In fact, I can't remember myself whining about anything. I didn't like summer heat (even til now) but I never said a word about how I don't like it. I wasn't expressive with words. I think I didn't have a mind of my own, in fact. I was just going with the flow. Thinking about it, I also wish I were still like that child now. It's a happy life to just take things as they come. No questioning why, what, how, when, where...I don't know if it's just me but I miss that point of my life when I wasn't grumbling about anything no matter how difficult things went. If I had to walk long, I'd walk long without getting irritated. I never criticized anyone. And whenever I heard others giving their thoughts about another, I was surprised how their thoughts were that advanced when it never crossed my mind what they observed or judged. I was naive. I didn't totally like it at that time, of course. I felt so dumb. Somehow, I taught myself to be more observant and vocal only because I didn't wanna be thought of as slow-witted. Couldn't be so wrong but the motive was wrong. I mean, it helped me become better. It helped me to strive to always give excellence in almost everything. Just I did it for the wrong reason. Lately, I've been thinking and wishing I still have even a little of that child in me, at least. A lotta things happened in my life and they made me who I am now. As I go through life there are more roads to trek and situations to pull of, so, naturally, God equips me with more tools. Only I need to learn how to operate them properly. Guess, God had to really expose what's in my heart to teach me better lessons that I would never learn any other way. I don't need to miss being that child and resent who I am now. I only need to make use of God's tools like self control. I may have learned the habit of complaining but He has given me the tool to fight it. In fact, He has given me the best tool of all ― LOVE. If I live and walk in love every second of my life, I am already fine. ^_^

Two last things I wanna share I learned the hardest this year are: to not be critical; and, to let go of control. If as a child I was just receiving everything as they're given to me, as an adult I became self-seeking. I am almost always after my self-interest. When things don't go my way, I become cranky. My words become blade that pierce people to the core. Should've been like this, should've been like that are just some of the famous lines that usually come out of my mouth. I became the person like those people I heard criticizing others during my childhood. I was reminded that I promised myself I will never be like them. But, I guess, I allowed myself to be corrupted by the world. 

Maybe I don't need to keep wishing to be that child again. I can't go back to being a child again. I can't keep looking at the rear view mirror and regret, resent and have all the negative feelings about how I turned out to be. In fact, I should be thankful because God saved me from being the monster I could've been had He not led me through the Holy Spirit. There's so much to thank God for than focusing on the downsides. Change is necessary and inevitable. All the things I had to go through, all that I have become through the years are part of everything. Part of my metamorphosis. And as I stumble, as I break, as I fall...I learn. I am humbled. And I acknowledge more that I am NOTHING apart from God. But, I am SOMEONE under His grace. To Him be the glory! Hopeful that the coming year will make me all peaches! ^_^

Just reflecting...