I suppose it’s about trust between people in the end.

We all should make efforts to not make the Christmas spirit fade anytime in a year. It should always remain and be felt even it's not December. I was reading diverse Christmas and holiday greetings over the Net and one of the messages that caught my attention is this: "this is the season of forgiving NOT JUST thanking". Well, I believe that we really NEED to forgive in order to express thanksgiving. We can never fully express how thankful we are for all the blessings we received if we don't do this act. The real essence of Christmas is celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ. It's all the reason why we are having the feasts, the gatherings, the exchanging of gifts...because God, through HIS Son, made that decision to forgive us our transgressions in order to have a relationship with us. As the Word says, "God so love the world that He gave His only begotten Son."

There are times I'd think about why is relationship WITH ME so important to God that He had to send Jesus here on Earth to serve, to suffer and to die an agonizing death ONLY to rescue me from my ungodliness and share an everlasting relationship with me. One Man had to suffer just because God wants me to have a relationship with Him. Doesn't make so much sense. Who am I? I've got nothing to offer Him anymore than He can offer me and the entire world. But HE wants me. He keeps chasing after me no matter how I try to run away. And, I believe this is the same with all human race. God intends for everyone to belong to Him.

Acknowledging this fact, there is truly a great reason for us to paint the town red. In fact, our merry making isn't enough because what God has done is something exceedingly praiseworthy. Nothing that our festivity can ever measure up to. Be that as may be, if we are to decisively offer thanksgiving, one of the best ways to do so is to FORGIVE. If we are truly thankful that Jesus saved us from our sins and we understand that He died so that we can be forgiven, then, whether we feel like it or not we must choose to forgive from the heart. Not because the person who wronged us deserves it, but because we are thankful that God forgave us even if we don't deserve to be forgiven.

So many people find it hard to forgive not because they can't. It's, actually, because of the what's-in-it for me mentality. Because we experienced betrayal and pain, we started living in fear that it might be done again to us. So now, we're being too careful. Many, often, reason they're just being "wise". Looking at it, it's more of a trust issue. It's looking after self to never be hurt again. If God thought this same way, I wonder if even a single person will deserve anything. I wonder if anyone will receive a second chance. Knowing that God knows what's in our thoughts and minds... He knows what we're gonna do the next second ... we are totally screwed! We can never pass godliness test. But, it's not the act that He is looking at. He offers trust without questions. Without telling us, "well, this is what you're gonna do after three minutes." No. He loves and accepts us wholly. Filthy as we are. He never said, "go and clean yourself up before I can receive you." In stead, He says, "I receive you so come and let's clean you up." How awesome is that?!

The world says, Trust should be EARNED. Not with God. None of us is trustworthy. All fall short, the Scripture says. But, God doesn't look at that. He looks at how HE can fix us. It's not about what we can do for ourselves to become better people. It's about what HE wants to do in order for us to fulfill the purpose He created us for. Taken that none is trustworthy, we are not to expect anyone to be trustworthy before we can trust them. If we choose to forgive, we also hafta choose to trust that any person can and will change. Maybe not immediately. Not after a day...not after a week...not after a month...It could take longer, in fact. But, the thing about trust is, it's same as faith. There's an absence of the thing hoped for. You can't see it right away. It's not yet visible. But, it eventually will be. Trust is believing in something or someone without logical reason. Otherwise, it's not trust. Yeah, it sounds risky. But, that's the essence of it. I don't understand certain things but I don't have to KNOW before I can CHOOSE to trust. It's a decision. It's voluntary.

Thing is, just like love, trust should be GIVEN. And, problem these days is that it's hard for people to give without assurance it'll be reciprocated. However, if we keep doubting...if we keep being suspicious about another person, we'll never be able to really trust. Because we're always thinking about protecting ourselves from pain. It's hard to give when we always come first before others. Fear hinders us from doing what we ought to do. We've been hurt before and we become prisoners of the bad experience so this time around we are guarded. Some are too guarded they can't release love because it translates to susceptibility to emotional suffering. One act from a person in the present that's similar to an act done by the person in the past triggers alarm. Until distrust rules the relationship. Cynicism becomes the main focus. It, then, manifests with the way we respond to people. Relationship suffers.

I am not saying that everyone should be trusted. Like, I can't welcome a criminal inside my house. I can't entrust my niece (I don't have one, though) to an ex-convicted rapist. That's extreme. All that God expects from us is to trust that HE is doing something in the heart of the person(s) we are dealing with on a daily basis. Someone might have wronged us but it doesn't mean they're always gonna do the same. Or, if they keep doing the same thing to us over and over as if they have no intention of changing, God still expects and requires us to trust that one day the person will change. Well, we all have things we want to change in us, don't we? And, most of the time, we keep failing and we find it hard to just change. But, we trust not ourselves to change what we want to change inside of us. We trust God that HE will change us. Similarly, if we are to trust anyone, we should first entrust them to God WHO can change the heart. The One Who can truly create change within. So, in stead of nagging and complaining about how a person never improves, it's much better to say a prayer and let God do the work in their lives.

"Love is patient and kind" means when we love someone, we should be patient in waiting til they become a renewed person; and, we must remain kind even we are hurting. Love always looks at the good of others. If it means enduring pain for now just so the other person is allowed his own pace to progress, so be it. That's love. That's trust. And I found out that the best gift we can offer each other is trust. Especially in love relationship. Well, it applies to friendship, too, because we always injure each other intentionally or unintentionally. But, those who are in a relationship ...those who are married ... trust is absolutely vital. I know of a couple who survived an ugly past only because the wife chose to trust that her husband is not gonna do again what he did in the not-so-distant past which hurt her. There's no guarantee but his word. Nevertheless, she chose to trust. What's more amazing is, she never kept record of the wrong. Never echoed the offense whenever they fought. She never spied on him. Never questioned him. Never doubted him. And that helped the relationship. Her decision made the husband really thankful and because of that he obliged himself not to cause her anymore heartache. How beautiful when we simply allow love to influence our actions. If we just simply stop over-thinking. If we quit fencing our grounds. Then, trust comes next. Trust comes easy.

If someone is really important to us...if a person means something to us... we want to keep the relationship with that person even when it hurts. I guess that's part of loving. Not being martyr. Part of loving is sacrificing a part of ourselves just so we can welcome a person into our lives. Just like what God did. HE sacrificed Jesus because we are important to Him. ...and just like what Jesus did. He denied Himself. Denied His rights...just so our relationship with our Heavenly Father will be restored. And, if we are sincerely thankful for this, we ought to FORGIVE voluntarily over and over...TRUST completely and LOVE graciously.  

“One of the biggest favors that you can do for yourself is to accept your loved ones for who they are, and not be constantly disappointed because they are not who you think they should be.”  ― Jennifer O'Neill