Swallow your pride occasionally, it's not fattening.

"Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you." Romans 12:3

Judgment and criticism are fruit of deeper problem -- pride. When the "I" in us is bigger than it should be, it will always cause the kinds of problems such as friction in relationships. The Bible repeatedly warns us about being high-minded.

Whenever we excel in an area, it is only because GOD has given us a gift of grace for it. If we are high-minded or have exaggerated opinion of ourselves, then it causes us to look down on others and value them as "less than" we are. This type of attitude or thinking is extremely detestable to the Lord, and it opens many doors for the enemy in our lives.

The devil loves to keep us busy, mentally judging the faults of others. That way, we never see or deal with what is wrong with us.

We cannot change others, only GOD can. We cannot change ourselves either, but we can cooperate with the Holy Spirit and allow Him to do the work. First step to any freedom, however, is to FACE THE TRUTH the Lord is trying to show us. Remember, your actions won't change until your mind does. "You cannot change what you do not acknowledge." One will never change if he keeps giving excuses to his faults or mistakes instead of acknowledging them before God and initiate willingness and effort to change.

When we have our thoughts and conversation on what is wrong with everyone else, we are usually being deceived about our own conduct. Therefore, Jesus commanded that we not concern ourselves with what is wrong with others when we have so much wrong with ourselves. Allow GOD to deal with you first, and then you will learn the scripture way of helping your brother grow in his Christian walk.

"Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye." Matthew 7:3-5

We ALL make mistakes. We ALL have weaknesses. The Bible says that we are not to have a hard-hearted, critical spirit toward each other, but instead, to forgive one another and to show mercy to one another just as GOD for Christ's sake has done for us.

"We often look at ourselves through rose-colored glasses, but we look at everyone else through a magnifying glass." This is giving ourselves more than enough privilege to err but giving far less tolerance when others fall short of our expectations. We make excuses for our own behavior, but when someone else does the same thing we do, we are often merciless.

The best way to battle pride, judgment and criticism in our thoughts and deeds is to replace our thoughts with the Word. To recite it in our head, and much better verbally, and let the enemy know that we are not going to succumb to what he is trying to do -- destroy our character. The character GOD is creating in us. It will be helpful if we speak this verse often, "God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble." [James 4:6] To remind us that GOD is not pleased with those who look at themselves highly than they should. In fact, there is nothing that we can brag about in this world. We are nothing. Everything comes from GOD. What right do we have to compare ourselves to others and tell ourselves we are better than them? It's like telling ourselves, "GOD loves me more that's why He created me better than everyone of you". Truth of the matter is, God shows no favoritism (Romans 2:11).

If we are serious in our walk with God, we do not want to allow the enemy pollute our minds with "I-am-better-than-everyone-else" mentality. We got to start making an honest assessment of ourselves. Acknowledge before God that we started the habit of comparing and judging. It is impossible to get from wrong behavior to right behavior without first changing thoughts. If we strongly believe and cling to what we believe that there's nothing wrong with us, then, God can never begin His work in us. The character and destiny He intends for us will have to take long before we can finally see and receive them. Or, they may never come. We are saved, yes, but without complete freedom and victory.

Are there any prayers you've been telling God for years and for the longest time you still don't see them happening? No answer whatsoever? Why not take some time to meditate...make an honest assessment of yourself..."what needs to be changed in me that God is silent about my prayer?" Is it pride? Is it your critical mind?

What supposed to be just an eleven-day journey took forty long years of journey only because of attitudes not corrected. (Deuteronomy 1) We can keep hoping forever all we want that our prayers will be answered and yet we're not willing to listen to what the Holy Spirit is saying, it might take us more than 40 years to receive our heart's desires.

The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart. 1 Samuel 16:7

It is wise to be real honest with ourselves about issues concerning our hearts. Are our thoughts right with God? How about our attitudes?

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“A proud man is always looking down on things and people; and, of course, as long as you're looking down, you can't see something that's above you.” ~ C.S. Lewis

Through pride we are ever deceiving ourselves. But deep down below the surface of the average conscience a still, small voice says to us, something is out of tune. ~ Carl Jung

Pride is an admission of weakness; it secretly fears all competition and dreads all rivals. ~ Fulton John Sheen

"If you love ME, love my rag dolls." - GOD

Sure we all desire so many things. This includes love. The very person we so wish will be with us forever. We desire strongly out of this longing inside. From this desire springs a lot more other things such as expectations, pain, disappointments...blah blah blah. Once, you thought if you only have this person (or something) in your life, you'll be happy. You never stop wanting, desiring, longing. Until one day, the person's (or the thing's) yours. Of course, at first, everything's fine and dandy. Butterflies and rainbows. Mostly sunny days. But, there'll always be storm. It will always come just when we least expect it. You probably have this in mind. You're prepared, no doubt. Why not? You operate with so much love. Just, little by little though, the other person whom you thought shares the same feelings with you don't operate with the same amount of love to your surprise. The relationship gets shaky. You try hard to hold it. To hold on. With all your strength. The love that once made you extremely happy is now causing you so much agony.

We keep asking GOD the question, "why?" "Why do I have to suffer?" "Why does it ache so bad?" We look else where for someone or something to blame without realizing that it is "our own selves" that caused us all these. It is our CHOICE.

This is what happens when GOD allows us to receive what we desire. He makes us realize how what we so yearn for can't truly make us happy. Happiness can't be found anywhere, in fact. It is within (if we are under HIS grace and love). If only we don't try to look for happiness outside of ourselves and just be happy who we are and what we have. Be content. Wait for GOD's perfect timing. We'll all be surprised at how right HE has always been.

Thing is, we all are unlovable. No matter how lovable you may look from outside, there are still so many things inside that can appear unlovable to others, eventually. (Just consider the number of broken relationships. What could've caused them?) In fact, looks will fade. One day, you'll also be unlovable. And it is in our unlovable condition that we, actually, long to be loved. NOT when we're lovable. It's easy to give love to lovable people. We all sneer at those we find unpleasant without realizing that we are, ourselves, less than lovable in the eyes of GOD. But, HE loves us, anyhow. Only GOD can look at our ragged selves with so much love and compassion. HE sees our thoughts and feelings. How we scheme against another. How we murder an innocent person with our minds. How we mess with our enemies' (sometimes even friends') reputations. All these HE sees. Yet, HE loves us still.

While watching the movie, "the Invention of Lying" one Monday afternoon, I thought, what I truly desire is to be loved in my unlovable state. Not when I am calm, patient and all the wonderful traits I have. I want to be loved more when am angry, depressed, irrational, dumb, careless...blah blah blah. I desire to hear, "I love you" just when I have done something terrible. Because this is just the time I need it. This is just the test how much one loves me. NOT when I am easy to love. How divine it would be if a "Mark Bellison" comes to me and sees me just as I am with all my bluntness & cruel remarks, and yet sees through me. Sees beyond my external. Anna McDoogles kept throwing him all the nasty comments he needed to hear. Enough to keep him away. But, he sees the unlovable in her without denying it and loves her still. She learned to love him back later on in the movie as she learned what it means to look beyond someone's appearance.

GOD loves us this way. He loves us so that even we're unworthy, ragged, wicked...HE still wants us. HE's still searching for us and wanting us to come back home to HIM. You probably have had people who professed their love for you and yet when you're at your worst left and never came back. Or, you left and they never searched for you. But, GOD, HE is the ultimate definition of LOVE. HE loves beyond reason. We never gave HIM any reason for HIM to love us. We don't even make enough effort; but, HE loves us just the same. Truly, in this world, we'll keep searching and searching for people, for things we think can make us happy. Can make us feel loved. But, it is ONLY GOD who can give us this kind of love and happiness.

I am always challenged by GOD to love others the same way. HE exposes to me how unlovable I am, yet HE loves me more and more. HE taught me that it is easy to love others, even the unlovable, when one experiences undeserved love. GOD has placed a tag price on each one of us. HE bought us for a price by sacrificing HIS only SON, JESUS CHRIST, as substitute for our sins. For yours and mine. If we only see how valuable each person is in HIS eyes, we'll probably see everyone valuable and precious, too.

We can never truly find happiness if we keep looking at imperfections. We should see imperfections right in the eye but we have to see it with love. We have to see someone's brokenness in order that we understand that all people are just like us...most of the time, broken. We, each one, fail. Almost always. If we are gracious in giving ourselves tolerance, then, why not give tolerance graciously to our fellowmen? We chase the wrong things. We keep asking and asking but are not willing to give. We demand that we be given happiness but we don't even take the responsibility to be good gifts to others. In stead, we hurt others. Sometimes, we hurt unintentionally, yet, don't feel any sorry at all. Apathy.

This is so sad.

I desire to be loved in my raggedness. Therefore, I must give love in spite of other's raggedness. GOD calls us to love HIM and HIS people (Matthew 22:36-40). It's a package deal.