A life without purpose is not a life worth living.
What do we live for? Are we chasing the wrong things? Are we putting value on the wrong things, relationships or emotions? If your answer to the last two questions is YES, then, you are not living a meaningful life.
So what? What's the point in creating a meaningful and purposeful life? I'll tell you what. One weighty reason is because 'we are all in search for real happiness'. Happiness that is genuine with peace and contentment can never be achieved if we live wandering around without making any sense of what our life is about. Emptiness is the outcome. We end up with a disillusioned life.
Often, we find ourselves lost. Without any clear vision of where we're going or what we're supposed to do. Everyday, we'd wake up and do our routine without clearly understanding why we're doing what we do. Or, because it's what we grow up learning to do with life. Children sleep early at night to wake up early the next day to prepare for school. They'd spend most of their day in the school campus, go back home and do the same things. Adults struggle to sleep early at night to wake up the next morning to prepare breakfast for the kids... single adults grab any ready-to-eat goodies in the fridge ... then, rush their way to the corporate world and deal with the everyday work pressures and stress. Everything like a routine. We think life is really just a cycle.
Truth is, children truly need to go to school and make good grades while adults, single and married alike, need to work, earn and save. However, these are not the only reasons why we all move on and go about with our valuable lives. If these were all the reasons we know why we live on Earth, then, happiness can never be found. Because there is nothing meaningful in these things aside from the fact that we all should survive. Children need to learn to land good jobs when they grow old. When they grow old, they should still keep struggling since competition is tight. What is so interesting about that?
Yet, aside from the basics, there are more in life that we need to understand. One is, we can make our life real meaningful. Something that gives us deeper purpose that will satisfy our soul. Something that will bring us true happiness from the satisfaction that we have done something extraordinary. By living outside the box. Who would want to remain using a black & white television set when colored ones are available? Break routines and seek your purpose. Learn how to make your life meaningful.
The question is "HOW?"
Not long ago, I couldn't understand what they mean by, 'life is about relationships'... 'no man is an island' until I learned that, indeed, we need others to be truly happy. Knowing that someone is listening, someone cares, someone understands... it's already a relief. We learn through others. The things we already know are sharpened and strengthened by another person.
I used to be a loner. But, whenever I was with people, I drew learnings from them. I inquired a lot about how they live, how they learn, how they react to situations without realizing my need for these information, which I can never learn had I chosen to not be around people. Good thing there's school. What could've happened to me if I were a complete hermit and locked myself in the house because of my natural fear of people hurting me?
If not for the people I met and allowed in my life, my learnings won't be complete. My knowledge of the world won't increase. Relationship is extremely important. All kinds of it.
...And maintaining relationships -- friendship, love, familial, etc -- requires making another person happy. Knowing that we make others happy gives us satisfaction and real happiness. It gives us self-worth knowing we have done something divine for another human being. At least, this is one very important way I know how to live a meaningful life. Not to mention very satisfying.
In fact, there are countless ways to live with so much purpose. Depends on each one of us. We must live according to how we are designed to live. But, here's a better way of realizing things better. When you start feeling empty, as if, you're walking half-asleep... with no clear direction... ask yourself these questions, 'why do I feel this way?' ... 'What is missing?' More often than not, we find these questions hard to answer. We struggle to get answers, and at times, we just give up we'd ever know the answers we need. This is about the time we must start to surrender ourselves to our creator Who knows the very purpose why we exist. It's just about time that we open our hearts and place our faith in only HIM.
During my 2ndth day (2ndth week) attending the "One Life To Live" seminar (I chose to be with the Wednesday people), Marielle, the group facilitator challenged us to answer one substantial question, "how NOT to live a life with purpose?" I was compelled to look back at my life. Here are my answers:
1. To live in the past.
2. To live with fear and disappointments.
(these were the only 2 answers I was able to give at that time since there was very limited time to discuss for each group member)
Elaboration: First point. Past is already history. We can never undo anything. We've been hurt, we've already failed... there's nothing that we can do to change what already happened. If we let our past take a hold of our life, then, we only tend to cling to the ugly events in our life, which will then, make us cynical. For those who have very good disposition, remembering the past can be helpful. The ugly events in their lives can inspire them to be resilient and strong. But, to most, dwelling in the past, especially, the not-so-pleasant-memories may hinder them from living a worthwhile life because something holds them back. They fear, therefore, they can't completely give of themselves. Am sure this is self-explanatory and many can actually give better rationale to this point I gave.
Second point. Once we become controlled by our tendency to live in the past, fear sets in. Disappointments collect. It becomes hard to trust because we remember that people in our past hurt us. So, the things we are supposed to do, we fail to do in fear people will let us down again. There will be things which we will be incapable of doing because we are afraid that we might fail again (if we keep remembering the failures we had when we were younger). Fear inhibits us from spreading our wings.
Personal experience taught me these things. I could've been a better person, I could've reached my dreams had I not allowed myself to live in the past and let fear control me. But, I already did. And the only way I can release myself from this bondage is to forget about "could've beens". I am choosing to live in the NOW. So, everything I wasn't able to do before, I will now leave behind so I can finally move on and start doing what I can do living in the present. I must stop dwelling in the past and remember sad memories only to teach me how I can live life to the full.
Surely, everyone of us have our own sad stories to tell. But, these stories should not hinder us from being the persons we ought to be. We must not allow our past pains to affect our relationships. We must not allow our past pains to control our lives, actions and way of thinking. Cause if we do, we are surely to waste our precious lives.
Because of my fears, I surrounded myself with very tall walls around me. I didn't want to be hurt. Not anymore. With it, I was not able to totally make use of my special gift -- compassion. Because of fear, my growth and progress were hampered. I missed so many opportunities. I didn't live my life to the full. I knew I could've done a lot, but with fear overwhelmed me, I was stuck. I wasted precious years. I wasted my life.
How about you? How will you answer this question based on your personal experience?... "how NOT to live a life with purpose?"
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