“I advise you to stop sharing your dreams with people who try to hold you back, even if they're your parents. Because, if you're the kind of person who senses there's something out there for you beyond whatever it is you're expected to do - if you want to be extra-ordinary- you will not get there by hanging around a bunch of people who tell you you're not extraordinary. Instead, you will probably become as ordinary as they expect you to be.”
― If You Have to Cry, Go Outside: And Other Things Your Mother Never Told You
Twas another enlightening fellowship with my Leaders' group last Sunday (2ndth of June 2013) afternoon. We talked about the "Grasshopper Mentality" with reference from the book of Numbers chapter 13. It's basically talking about how little you look at yourself is how others will look at you. And, it's true. Sometimes, the way we look at ourselves ― so little ― becomes us and we invite others to treat us that way ― small. It's still a different story, o'course, if you think highly of yourself. That's not even a suggestion to remedy this problem. What this practically teaches us is we better start appreciating ourselves how we're designed and quit comparing ourselves with others. They're different designs with different purposes. Just concentrate on your own and do the best that you can with the gifting that's given you. No matter how small you think your contribution is to the society, it's still needed. Nobody hinders you from reaching a goal but yourself because you're too focused on an image you yourself created.
By feeling small you end up insecure. And from this insecurity will ignite the negatives within. It's dangerous. It's damaging. Many people react to this insecurity by pulling people down, and attacking their emotions. They want others to stay down with them so they'd do every possible thing to break their faith in themselves. Pretty lonely down there so they rather want companions. Never allow yourself be among this group of people. Believe how God defines you and live around that definition so nothing can tear you apart.
Don't resent those people who try to kill your dreams, though. Being a hater won't take you anywhere either. Pity them, in stead. Have compassion for them that their fate is like that. If all possible, help them out of that pit. Be the good influence in their lives. But, know that at the end of each day, it's their choice. Don't take it upon yourself to clean all their mess. You're not a failure if nothing good happens to them. Just plant the seed and go on with your journey. There may still be more along the road who need your guiding light.
We are all created FOR each other NOT against each other. Those who are treating you roughly still have a good purpose in your life. Face them with confidence. None of us are designed for another's enjoyment and pleasure. We need not please everyone. Give your best at all times, but should that remain not enough for them, know that it isn't your problem anymore. You can't live your life always trying to meet people's expectations. That life's exhausting! Nothing will ever suffice because the wants and needs never run out. Just do your part in anyone's life and keep in mind never to inflict pain. At least, not deliberately. That should do.
I lived a hard life and barely enjoyed my growing up years because I've been too occupied trying to please people around me. There came a point when I started resenting the person I become. Envying so many things that others enjoy and I don't. Most of my decisions are influenced by whether or not it will make everyone happy. Sounds selfless, but it's actually selfish. Selfish in the sense that the reason why I am doing my best is because I want love and appreciation. I wanted to be embraced by these things. But, sadly, am only as good as my last performance. Next day is another. And many of the wonderful things I'd done are nothing but history. It's life. So, it's pointless to allow yourself revolve around people. There's more in life that need attention. There's more to life than just being loved and appreciated. What I learned is, if you just keep yourself busy loving and appreciating, there's no time nor effort wasted. Care not too much about receiving. Just get busy giving without expectation of return.
Allow no one's definition of you affect you. Never allow people to dictate your fate by listening to what they THINK is for you or not for you. If you'll just be real honest with yourself, you are your best judge. Don't believe too much what others THINK are your strengths and weaknesses. It's helpful to get feedback, of course. But, to be weighed down by criticisms and opinions...that's the worst move you'll ever make. Be wise. Understand that God has given you talents, skills and gifts. Utilize them and don't let people dim your light just like that. You can't stop people from throwing stones at trees that bear so much fruits. Take that as a compliment. ^_^
Toodles! ^_^
“I can’t”… “It’s not possible”… “I’m Not good enough”
― These are lies the demons of your past use to scare away the possibilities of the present.”
― Steve Maraboli
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