I think I've been asleep most of my life.

...Seriously, now! I mean, everything seems to be such a surprise to me. I always end up pondering about things that happen in a day -- everyday. Like... how gossip can result to tremendous injury to relationships and yet people won't give it up. Rumors do break up friendships. Haven't we realised this yet?

Gossip, it kills trust and faith. We injure our own souls by it. The yentas just don't realise how much trouble they are causing their own reputes more than the inconvenience they're causing the persons they're tattling about. Can't help but to tut-tut about it. *glaring eyes*

Don't we have anything more sensible to talk about? Like how we can live life to the full, maybe?

*sigh* Well, enough of my babbling... better if I just share this with you. Makes better sense.

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WHO’S GOT YOUR TONGUE

It’s been estimated that a talkative person may speak 30,000 words a day! But the important question is, how do our words, whether many or few, affect others?

A Greek philosopher asked his servant to cook the best dish possible. The servant, who was very wise, prepared a dish of tongue, saying, “It’s the best of all dishes, for it reminds us that we may use our tongue to bless and express happiness, dispel sorrow, remove despair, and spread cheer.”

Later the servant was asked to cook the worst dish possible. Again, he prepared a dish of tongue, saying, “It’s the worst dish, for it reminds us that we may use our tongue to curse and break hearts, destroy reputations, create strife, and set families and nations at war.”

We don’t have to eat tongue to grasp that servant’s point. But we may have to “eat our own words” quite often before we learn to avoid saying things we’d like to retract.

Solomon wrote: “The tongue of the wise promotes health” (Proverbs 12:18). It affirms and encourages others. The key word in that verse isn’t tongue but WISE. The tongue is not in control, but the person behind it is.

If you want your tongue to build people up and not tear them down, ask God to make you wise.

- Joanie Yoder

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Dear Darla, I hate your stinkin' guts. You make me vomit. You are the scum between my toes. Love Alfalfa.

What I find most strange is this -- how a group of girls in a particular place (could be the entire locale or office or school) would treat a new girl in a rather mean way, in stead of giving the latter a nice and warm welcome.

Seen this analogous scenario on PBB last night. Looks very familiar and it's vicious. I find it very galling cause there shouldn't really be any problem if not for this capricious and manipulative group. What's more surprising is that they didn't (don't) see themselves as the root of the problem. They consider themselves guiltless with valid reasons to act the way they did. So, it's the new girl's fault, huh?! When they gather together and leave the girl behind with this question in mind, "what could be wrong with me?" "Why don't they like me?"

But, the new girl can't be self-pitying for an unknown reason. She's got better things to do than feel sorry that the girls don't like her. So, she goes on doing what she's there to do. And this aggravates the sitch even more -- annoying the mean group further. Like provoking a colony of bee to swarm you.

Just what is the problem with girls? I mean, I am a girl myself, yes. But, I had never made anyone feel as if they should be isolated from my group (I never had one, though). I mean, what's the point?

All of us have different impressions on a new person in the place. But, it's never for us to judge about the person's character especially not when we have no basis but our hidden insecurities. Are we just protecting our territory so we're doing every possible thing to hinder the new person to feel comfortable with the group? Afraid that he or she might become more popular than the rest of you? Or maybe, threatened that this new person will take your place and dominate the group. I have no idea but dogs are so like that.

In her book, the 27-year-old Simmons offers a plaintive definition of relational aggression: ''Unlike boys, who tend to bully acquaintances or strangers, girls frequently attack within tightly knit friendship networks, making aggression harder to identify and intensifying the damage to the victims. Within the hidden culture of aggression, girls fight with body language and relationships instead of fists and knives. In this world, friendship is a weapon, and the sting of a shout pales in comparison to a day of someone's silence. There is no gesture more devastating than the back turning away.''

... ''Beneath a facade of female intimacy,'' she writes, ''lies a terrain traveled in secret, marked with anguish and nourished by silence.''