Thursday, February 25, 2010

Stand up for what you believe in, even if you're standing alone.


Am concerned about how most of our presidentiables (and many politicians) are blaming corruption for poverty. Not that corruption has nothing to do with it but it is definitely not the major or only cause. I do not agree that there is a single person in this world that is not at all corrupt. We all are. Every single centavo we don't own and knowingly or unknowingly slip inside our pockets is already corruption. Already stealing. A centavo may appear insignificant but if its not from our own sweat and blood, it's theft. Consider how many centavos are being slipped into pockets of whoever everyday.

One of the traits Filipinos have is sense of gratitude. The fact that many are accustomed to asking favors already proves the impossibility of eliminating corruption. Small favors that become more frequent and eventually will have to be returned. This is one form of small corruption that happens daily.

Petty as it may sound but all big things start from small. Say, I am close friends with someone holding important position in a company. Because this person's close to me, I know that he/she will never refuse to help me when I ask him/her a favor. So, when another friend of mine asks help to get a promotion... no matter how incompetent this friend is ...I can still confidently offer help because friend A has the power to grant my request and I know that he/she won't turn me down. And, although, friend A knows that friend B is not competent, he/she will still give him/her the promotion, anyway.

If you look at this scenario there seems to be nothing wrong. But, there will always be expectations from the one granting favor. If not anytime soon...in due time. Plus, the fact that friend B might be a problem, eventually, because of lack of competency, all else is compromised.

This doesn't happen in only one company. Happens to almost all companies for various reasons. Not only in companies, in fact. Even in our daily activities, this has become a practice. Power is everything. And when it is not properly used, the world is in great danger.

Who can truly fight corruption when it is in each one of us? What Ptr. Rico Ricafort mentioned last Sunday is so true. Self-governance is the most effective way to fight corruption. Unless we are strong enough to govern ourselves properly, corruption will always be present. How will we conduct ourselves in certain situations when no one is watching? A very important question to answer.

Poverty has become out of hand not ONLY because of corruption. Those who blame corruption as the cause of poverty are only leading people away from another truth. Poverty is caused by poor self-governance. Why don't we tell the poor people that they should work to feed their children in stead of just waiting for donations? Why don't we teach them to limit their children to 2 if they can't even support 1?

Please don't get me wrong but I just believe that we all must be concerned with the quality of life we give the youth. If a couple is unable to provide proper nourishment to a child, why add another one and let them go hungry? And then, add another one and another one yearly until 13 kids will soon have to share a plate of instant pancit canton.

What am trying to point at now is simple...no one should instill in anyone's head that it is the government's responsibility and obligation to provide for the poor. Assistance should be given but NOT sustenance, as if, only they (the poor) have the privilege to receive provisions from the government. How about the simple employees who pay taxes? The very rich, the business owners, the professionals, doctors, lawyers... they can manipulate their declaration of income, but not the middle class who are doing 9 to 5. These workers receive their wages already with deductions. It is the humble employees who are feeding the poor. It is the humble employees that are paying those in the government positions. The poor represents the bigger percent of the population. Imagine the big number of people who are dependent on the government. Imagine the number of non-tax payers.

From television programs, I get to see how it's like in the slum areas. Those people find shelter under bridges or flyovers...in abandoned lots...along the riverbanks...almost every corners of the streets. And they really look pitiful. I sincerely feel for them. But, being poor is also a choice. Yes, I acknowledge the fact that there are a lot of indigent people who are not given opportunities. We can't put all the blame on them for their fate. But... another but is ...there used to be destitute people who found their way out of poverty. How were they able to do that? Who helped them? What inspired them? In stead of pointing at corruption as the cause of poverty, why don't we educate the impoverished that they "also" have a part in their condition? Open their eyes that if they stop idling around and start keeping themselves busy they can get out of that miserable situation they're in. For as long as we keep giving excuses for their state, they will never learn how to help themselves. They will never learn their own responsibilities to themselves and as citizens of this country.

The thing with over-emphasizing that poverty is a result of corruption...people are made to believe that it is beyond their power to change their status. That it is somebody else's duty to get them out of their misfortune. If everything will be blamed to the government, then, what responsibility do we play as individuals? What is our role as citizens? The government can only do much. We have to play our parts. We can all start by being wise voters. By using our better judgment in choosing who can truly properly run the country. By realizing that talk is cheap. Listen not to the words being spoken but to the facts that are being hidden from us. Realize that those who are telling our less-privileged people that it's the corrupt that is to be blamed, they are only patronizing poverty because, truth is, they want the poor to multiply because this class of people represents the bigger percent of voters.

Why isn't anybody telling the destitute what they should hear? Because those who are aiming for a position in the government know that when they tell the truth, they will repel these people. So, what they do is they empathize with them and act as if they truly care. If they are really sincere, they would tell them the truth and not make them depend on donations. Like the saying goes, "Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day; teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime." Knowledge is the best charity we can give anyone. The fact that many politicians don't teach the less privileged to fish means they don't really intend to end poverty. They're promoting it and tell the destitute that it's not their fault they're poor. What makes them poor is corruption. Come on! Tell them where they're doing wrong first and then blame corruption later on. Just my 2 cents.








Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Beauty is not caused. It is.



Every girl's (even boys, I believe) problem has always been zits. Gone are the days when the only solution available's "Calamansi". I remember my dad proudly taught me about it when small pimples started appearing on my forehead. That was when I started using face powder in high school. He told me that my aunt's best friend was Calamansi. It's quite convincing since she really have very beautiful skin. Of course, it's not just the topical treatments that give her skin its natural glow. Diet and discipline helped a lot. She's a vegetarian, may I mention.

Anyway, that was Jurassic era. Now, we are all so lucky to have a variety of aids to choose from. There's Obagi, Murad, Mario Badescu, Proactiv, just to name a few. But, of course, these product brands are not so friendly to everyone since they are kind of costly. But, then, there are also products out there that are pocket friendly. However, their efficacy differs from one skin type to another. You just have to patiently find what could be effective for you.

Among the popular pimple fighting products you can see in our major supermarkets, groceries and drugstores are Ponds, Olay, Clerasil, Panoxyl (this is very effective in drying the zits but can also dry or burn the skin), Eskinol...astringents such as MaxiPeel, and the more affordable products like Mena and Renow-D (these are Chinese products, I think). All these products have their share of impressive testimonials.

I've tried several products, as well. But found one to be the most effective for me -- SOS (Save Our Skin - Clindamycin Phosphate). It's a topical treatment for acne.




Twas only by accident when I found out about this product just a couple of years ago. I was only buying some munchies at a Mercury Drug Store nearby when I saw this product displayed near the cashier. I read the label and decided to give it a try since, at that time, I had huge beauty spots on my cheeks and forehead. My breakouts are usually allergic reaction to certain foods so they're really stubborn and last for some weeks. Worse, they often leave scars and marks. Grr.

So, I tried SOS. I read the label again for instruction and opened the small bottle. It's akin to a mini roll-on deodorant and smells like antibiotic. But, you'd get used to it eventually. Especially, when you start experiencing its wonderful effect.


After washing and drying my face, I rolled it on the affected areas. After a few seconds, I felt the parts where I applied SOS on were a lil itchy. So, I went to the mirror and looked at how my skin's reacting. Puss was coming out and I didn't even prick them!They're just literally flowing from inside my poor inflamed facial skin. I was kinda concerned it might leave another ugly marks.

Next day, the zits were almost gone and, remarkably, unlike the other products I previously used, the areas where the pimples were the night before didn't show any marks, at all. I was happy! The next time I applied SOS, I also rolled it on areas of my face where there were scars and dark spots. They, too, eventually diminished. After only 3 days, the dark spots had become invisible. Hurray!

But, of course, although SOS truly makes wonders I am aware that discipline is necessary to keep my skin healthy. I, now, avoid foods I know are common allergens. So, buh-bye chicken (Mang Inasal, KFC, KR... *sobs*), eggs, "some" chips...blah blah blah.

Since I am hypersensitive to allergens I am already careful with what I eat. I also drink as much fluid as I can. The tea JP introduced to me, I must say, also helps big time. It's called Nutri Health Drink. It contains Green tea, L-Carnitine, Seaweeds, Vitamin-C and Glutathione. I will talk about it next time.

Enough sleep is also very helpful. From sleeping only about 2 hours, I try sleeping longer hours now and I stay away from stress. I avoid negative thoughts and struggle so hard to keep my beauty routine. (Every now and then, I fail to keep up with it, though. *sigh*)

Am highly recommending SOS as replacement to our old school acne home remedy treatments, and expensive beauty products.

Toodle-oo!










Sunday, February 21, 2010

I understand. I'm tired of understanding. All I do is understand.


Sometimes all we ask for is simply to be given allowances. To be understood. Maybe it's just me but I feel that I am so restricted. That I have to be always careful with what I do or I fail someone. This, to me, seem unfair. And, not to mention...requiring such unflinching effort.

There are times am wondering how come there are too many "really" bad people who can just get away with some nasty things they do to another. Yet, when it comes to me, one wrong move and it's like I never done anything good in my life. When I know there were countless goods I'd done. (All us have done countless goods to others...even the bad guys.) When I know in my heart that in everything I do, I always consider the welfare of others. How can life be so bias?

You know those bullies in school? Or the work bullies? They do whatever they wish. They lord over the weak but do they even get punished enough? Of course, I don't mean to say they must be severely punished. Just am thinking why am I not given the same consideration as these group of people? People give excuses for them. That they're from broken families, that they're this and that... Can't anyone also give reasons for me sometimes? Don't I have the right to be like everyone else -- human? Flawed, that is.

After I had forgiven myself for some unpleasant things I'd done, I realized that you can never truly understand your humanity until you get into a state of sporadic madness. I'd even conclude that you are never truly a human being until you get into this state. Because nobody's perfect. Yet, most of my earlier years, I made great attempts to be. I was almost successful in trying to be proper as humanly possible. Many even thought I was too-good-to-be-true (by doing so). Some cynics around me even insisted there were ulterior motives behind my actions. Some even took closer look at my every move to catch me red-handed. Like the dot on a clean bond paper... the mistakes I made are what people rather use to define me. At least, this is how I was made to feel.

Ecclesiastes 7:16 makes lotsa sense: Do not be overrighteous, neither be overwise--why destroy yourself? That's why I started allowing myself to just be human. All I need everyone to understand is I also have moods. I also get angry. I also feel pain. Are these things only your privileges? No. Because I, too, am a person. A person influenced by emotions.

Can I just go on with my life not having to beg for understanding? Without having to explain or defend myself all the time? Must I simply not care about how people unfairly judge me and just tell and admit to myself I'd done some silly stuffs, therefore, I just deserve whatever judgment given to me?

There are really times it gets truly frustrating. Especially, when you know in your heart that you care. I wish I do not care, at all. Tell myself the same things most people tell themselves when people look down on them -- "you're not a loss" ..."I am blessed with so many friends so you can get lost!" ..."you're not worth my time" blah blah blah. How I wish I can just convince myself that people don't matter to me. Only they do. Sidewalk beggars even move my heart. I cry inside (often literally) whenever I see hungry street children selling sampaguita garlands in highways and knock on car windows when traffic light shows red. How much more my acquaintances...friends?

Lizzie would always tell me that I am (and will be) given no chance to prove myself by people who, right from the start, don't like me. There's no point in expecting they ever will. No great deed I can ever do to change the way they see me because they simply don't like me and I just gotta accept that. So, am only causing trouble to myself hoping that there is something that I can do to change the way they feel about me. Even if it costs me my life. Simply put irremediable. Stage 4.

Will just conclude this journal with this quote:

"when you meet a person for the first time, please don't judge them by their station in life. Because who knows, that person just might end up being your best friend."







Saturday, February 20, 2010

What a joke.


Sometimes, it is the boring stuff I remember the most.






Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Life is a dance step that never goes out of style.


Whenever my brain lags, I simply LINK my written thoughts from one online journal to another. Hope clicking LINKs is not so much of a trouble to my readers, is it? Xie xie This one's from FS.






Wednesday, February 3, 2010

“Never waste a minute of your precious life by squandering it thinking about people you don't like.”


“All blame is a waste of time. No matter how much fault you find with another, and regardless of how much you blame him, it will NOT change you. The only thing blame does is to keep the focus off you when you are looking for external reasons to explain your unhappiness or frustration. You may succeed in making another feel guilty about something by blaming him, but you won't succeed in changing whatever it is about you that is making you unhappy.”



Funny thing about unforgiveness is that one lives in the past that he tends to neglect about today. In stead of keeping the focus on what is NOW, he keeps looking behind. What happened in the past cannot be undone, but it can still wreck the present by sulking over something you cannot anymore reverse. When the fact of life is simply...someone will always come and hurt you... purposefully or accidentally. Nobody's perfect. And you know in yourself that you've also hurt someone in the past. You've also said harsh words to another. And this is because we are all flawed. We are not always in our good state. That is why, we need to forgive others for what they'd done evil to us. And we also need to forgive ourselves. Then, let go. Because no matter how you sulk over spilled milk, there is nothing much you can do about it.

We must also not judge others for the wrongs they'd done. None of our mistakes define us. Each person gets to be in a state of emotional insanity, every now and then, when placed in an uncomfortable situation. Yet, that occasional emotional insanity doesn't entirely define who we are. And to hate someone for being occasionally emotionally insane is foolish. If we can only learn how to be as tolerant as we are to ourselves when we get to be in a state of emotional insanity, we'll find it easier to get along with others. We'd find it easier to understand them and forgive.

Grudge in your heart will only rob you of happiness. One good example I can share is this:

Someone was done something which to her was offensive. She took it real personally that no matter how the other person explained her side and uttered apologies, this girl simply can't move on and this affected the way she behaves and the way she views things. She harbored grudge in her heart so every time she bumps into this person, she explodes like a volcano. She can't have peace within.

What's worse in nurturing grudge is it leads to bitterness. What happy life we could've had becomes more impossible to achieve because our vision is blurred by anger. Happiness is, indeed, a choice. For we cannot control nor expect people around us to demean the way we wish they would. Our friends will even always fall short of our expectations. Things won't always go the way we want. But, we can always choose to forgive each little lapse and let go.


You'll hear people say, "he'd done me this. I can't forgive him." Or, something like, "had you not done that I couldn't have reacted this way". Thing is, no one can always be too careful not to hurt another. Not even you. Not even me. There will always be something we do that'll hurt another intentionally or unintentionally. And if you even carefully listen to what was said..."had you not done that"... well, sadly, it's already been done. It's past tense. Nothing can be done to undo it. We just need to accept that it did happen and learn to forgive. Choose to forgive. Don't carry the load. Grudge is such a burden to carry. One can choose to put it down and leave it behind and walk with great ease in stead of feeling sorry that it had to happen and forever carry the choler.

While it is true that had things didn't happen the way they did, life could've been much better. But, that's just a fact of life, though: things happen. More often, what happens make us. It is our choice if we'll allow a situation to break us. But, again, it is a matter of choice. And if your eyes ever open and you realize that a situation broke you, it's never too late to pull yourself back together.

Pointing at what happened in the past is like blaming history for your situation. I talk by experience. I used to keep blaming someone for something wrong done to me. But, I had to learn the hard way that reacting negatively to it won't help me in any way. Because of anger, I misbehaved. I hurt people. Then, I realized that's not me. That's not who I am. I had become a different person. I allowed my anger unleash the monster in me. I couldn't anymore recognize myself. One day, I woke up and told myself, "this isn't me". It dawned on me that what really was making me unhappy is the fact that I know I was not anymore the person I used to know. Day by day, as I acted negatively to this particular person, I became more frustrated not with the person but with myself. Then, I recognized it's not really the other person that brings out the good or the bad in me. It is my own self.

"had you not done that, I wouldn't have reacted the way I did" is just taking the blame off you. Someone said the same thing to me. I just can't understand why does she keep reacting to a situation that was way bygone. As far as I'm concerned, the current sitch is far different and apologies have been lavishly given. Truth is, she only refuse to snap out of that episode in the past as if it's still happening in the present. It's like still living in the Marshall Law era when we have so much democracy in the present. Or, trying to feel the pain when the wound has already healed. Just doesn't make any sense.

I am not saying this because I want to be forgiven nor I believe I deserve to be. All I desire is for everyone to learn the benefits of forgiving. It doesn't only release you from deep pain. It also teaches you how to live a life free from negative emotions and it also saves you from becoming the monster you never want to be.

Whether or not a person deserves to be forgiven...whether or not a person says sorry... forgiving is not some favor you give anyone. It is a favor you give yourself. But, I guess, just like experience is the best teacher...one can never truly learn to forgive unless he gets into a situation where he needs to be forgiven.

















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A Love with a promise of permanence.

"...if any hear MY voice and open the door,  I will come into their house and eat with them,  and they will eat with ME." ...

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